Lost With No Control

Chapter 6

(GRIFFITH'S POV)

She cries softly in my shoulder and I gladly hold her. In all honesty, her situation isn't as bad as I was expecting it to be. Madeline would finally get to live a good life, with regular meals and nice clothes. Plus, Elliot is actually not a complete ass. He was always a little more wild than my other brothers but takes care of what's his. He's supposed to be president next. Loosing her is the last thing I'd want, but her happiness is my happiness. I am so so happy when she's by my side. I know she's not devastated here, but every time I see her glancing down the forbidden hallways wishing she was free, my heart breaks. I know it's not fair to expect her to stay here with me when she could be somewhere else and live a nice life. I can't be selfish like that.

But she doesn't have to be somewhere else right now.

So it is ok to be selfish... Right?

I pull her impossibly closer to me and cherish the moment. She smells of vanilla frosting and pastry batter. She curls into me even mor and I squeeze her tight, pouring out all my feelings into the embrace. Most likely, she is oblivious to these feelings of mine, the same way she is oblivious to the way almost every male in the area looks at her like she was a piece of candy.. Wow, good job on that analogy Griffith... But seriously sometimes she doesn't see something when it's right in front of her. For example, this opportunity of a lifetime that she is currently crying about.

Knowing that if I ever tell her how I feel she will either run away from me screaming or think that I mean it in a brother-sister way hurts me a little.

Eventually her sobs dissolve into hiccups and she pulls away from me.

"What do I do?"she asks.

I don't know what to tell her. I really do want to tell her the truth, but I know the answer isn't what she wants to hear.

<<nothing>>

"What do you mean "nothing"?! There has to be something!"

<<there is nothing anyone can do except listen and obey and listen and obey. It's the way of our life, and even if it's a sad one, it's the one we're forced to live. I can't do anything for you except wish you the best. I'm sorry>>

"What do you mean by that?! Do you not care? Is that it? Do you want me out of your life? Do you want me to go marry Elliott and never see you again?"

She stands up, furious.

"I can't believe you! I thought you were my friend! I thought I could rely on you to always be there for me! I hate you!"

She storms out of the room and slams the door.

I'm not usually one to complain about what I don't have but rather look at the things I do have and appreciate those things, but right now I just really wish I could correct her. I just wish I could tell her the truth; all of it.

I wish I could speak.

=======================

(MADELINE'S POV)

I don't know what to feel.

Alone, maybe?

Betrayed?

Lost?

I can feel warmth on my cheeks, a strange contrast to the rest of my body, which is frozen in shock.

Sitting in the corner of my room, hiding from the world, I begin to process the day I just had.

The waiting.

The engagement, if you can call that.

The confusion.

The hurt.

I've never needed someone more than now. Where is my mom? Where is Griffith? Where am I? The tears continue to slide silently down my face.

Empty.

That's what I feel.

Ayeeeeee it's me again

So guess who is a complete liar because she said she'd post more often? (This kid!) honestly I just got super absorbed into YouTube and basically became obsessed with a few new YouTubers (or at least these two that I had heard of but never really watched) and forgot that I had this chapter ready... For several months...

Yeah sorry 'bout that...

For those wondering and still reading, the people I am newly obsessed with are danisnotonfire and amazingphil ;)