I like this already. I like the way you have gone straight into the characters history. But get a cover with the title on it.
May I point out that this isn't finished so I am only reviewing the first couple of chapters.
I like the part where he hurls the breifcase at the wall, and you have decribed his emotions amazingly. However, the singing from the Church being heard in his car does seem a little unbelievable.
You might want to remove the part that say "this guy's gone too far", when he is called Brother Jeffrys. I mean, don't go to a Church if you don't want to be called brother/sister, right?
I couldn't find any faults with the rest of it, and enjoyed it xD
Continue to write it.
Minty18
