Black Ice

Chapter Two

"Lies and secrets, they are like a cancer in the soul. They eat away what is good and leave only destruction behind." 

~Cassandra Clare

*****

It's been two hours since I woke up in the hospital. 

Mum came to see me. She cried. She kissed my cheeks and threw her arms around me. She said she was afraid I was going to die. I simply stared at her, wordless, expressionless. 

I can't find it in myself to feel right now. I know that after everything I've been through, after everything that is to come, I should be laughing, or sobbing, at least. But the pain that I feel is so intense that everything in my body seems to have numbed out, and it's easier just to shut everything away in a closet in my mind. 

Mum left about ten minutes ago. After she realized I wasn't responding to her, she asked the nurses what was wrong. They simply said I'd been through a lot and I needed time. She sat by my bedside for a while, before the nurse came in and announced the arrival of my baby sister, Bethany. Mum rushed out. 

Probably to warn her that her big sister is acting like a ghost. 

I feel like a ghost. Barely here, wisps of me drifting away. I cling to them desperately, thinking of all the happy memories, but I can feel myself dying. It's faint, but the gentle pull is there, like a breeze on my cheek. I shiver. 

"Do you need a blanket, Miss Walker?" The nurse offers. 

I simply stare at her. 

She sighs. "Adolescents. So moody. I could have gone to the infant ward, but nooooooo..." Grumbling, she makes her way out of the room. The door swings shut behind her.

I can't do this. I can't hold up this charade. My eyes burn. 

I blink back tears. 

Emotions well inside me like fireworks, sudden and hot and loud. Anger, fear, resentment, sadness, loneliness. But more than anything a longing for the life I could have had. I could have changed the world. Instead, I have thirty days, the first of which I'm spending in the ER.

I fall back onto my pillow. 

A tear slides down my cheek. 

*****

"I don't understand," Mum argues. "We'll call you if there are any developments in her condition, but right now she needs her comforts of home!" 

"And I take no issue with that," Dr. Martinez replies, throwing his hands into the air. "But it would be unwise to move Alysson when we still know so little about her recovery process. To withstand such a terrible jolt...she should have broken her neck." 

Goosebumps erupt across my forearms. I did break my neck. At least, in an alternate universe, I did. Or I will. Or...I did...? God, this is confusing. I rub my forehead with the heel of my palm. 

Mum is going off on my poor doctor now. "I know her better than you ever will, and I think I have the right to decide what's best for her! I've raised her since she was a toddler-" 

"She's adopted, correct?" Dr. Martinez interrupts.

Mum bristles. "Why is that of any concern to you? Are you suggesting that just because I'm not her blood relative that I don't have the authority to decide-" 

"No, no, no!" He blurts, desperately backtracking. "Not at all. I'm only saying, it's not possible for you to know Alysson's full medical record. She could have any sort of hereditary conditions from her biological parents-" 

"She was hit by a car, she's not having a baby!" Mum yells. Several nurses glance over in alarm. I resist the urge to facepalm. I'm willing to bet that's going to start some rumors. 

"It makes no difference!" Dr. Martinez yells right back, his face turning red. "I have a medical degree, you have no right-"

"I am her MOTHER-"

"I am a DOCTOR-"

"SHUT UP!" I shout, pressing my hands over my ears. My head is ringing. 

Dr. Martinez immediately rushes over, concerned. "I'm terribly sorry, Alysson, let me get you a glass of water to help with your headache." He glares at Mum. "Now do you understand that she may have symptoms that she hasn't shown yet? Sensitivity to sound, for one." 

Mum turns up her nose at him and says nothing. 

I lay back down in bed, reveling in the glorious quiet as the doctor bustles out to get me a drink and Mum steps over to the window to cool down. 

"She's adopted, correct?" 

I never thought about how my being adopted could effect my health. But I suppose I could have all sorts of hereditary illnesses passed down from my mother and father. 

My mother and father. 

My father. 

I sit bolt upright in bed. Mum jumps. "Goodness, Alysson, are you alright?"

I'm not listening. 

Everything makes sense now. 

"Use your time wisely, Alysson."  Maya's words of wisdom. 

I know what I have to do. I have to repair my relationships. I have to fulfill my destiny. I have 29 days of life left. 

I have to find my real dad. 

*****

AN: I know it's short, and I'm sorry. As always, please comment away. Give me your thoughts on Alysson's plan. Constructive criticism appreciated!

Pun of the day: My friend kept making these awful bird puns. He was driving me mad...until I realized toucan play at this game. 

Love!

-HopelessByComparison