Zodiac Horoscopes

Which pet goes best with the signs?

Gemini: A talking parrot; need I say more? Well, of course I do, but-

Cancer: Anything, as long as it needs to be nurtured.

Leo: A big, bold, ferocious feline, as long as it doesn¹t compete with its owner¹s place in the sun.

Virgo: Let¹s see, I have to get up at 7:30 to feed it, let it out at 7:45, at 10:00 I need to go to the grocery store to pick up three cans of food, which will cost $3.86, including tax-

Libra: Hm, good question. One the one hand, a dog is active, affectionate, and companionable. On the other hand, a cat is pretty independent and won¹t require as much time and attention. Oh, I don¹t know. What would you do? Are you sure?

Scorpio: A cat. Secretive, mysterious, and unpredictable. What¹s not to like?

Sagittarius: A horse, of course! Let¹s hope it¹s got enough stamina to keep up with me.

Capricorn: Do I have to pay for it?

Aquarius: A hamster. First, I¹ve got to set up a detailed cage with tubes going from here to here, and an energy sensor-they don¹t make anything like that? That¹s okay, I¹m sure what I come up with will be much better.

Pisces : Fish. When their owner forgets about them for weeks on end, they¹re easy to replace. If Pisces remembers to replace them...