Talking to the Moon (Haikyuu Tsukishima Kei One Shot)

Talking to the Moon

"I know you're somewhere out there, somewhere far away"

I sit alone in my bare apartment. It's always like this, and I couldn't remember the last time it wasn't. We might still be on the same planet, the same country, even the same city. Hell, we might still be going to the same high school together, but that doesn't mean he wasn't still so far, far away.

He was basically on the moon; far away. And at this point, it's what I'm hoping for.

"I want you back, I want you back"

I finally decided that for once, I would get out of the cage that I called home. In the back of my mind, I realized it's probably the worst idea I could've thought, since it raised the possibility of running into him, even though he was supposedly farther away from me than far. But still, I pondered the thought and put it into action.

I swallowed the necessary pills it took for me to be able to function in society and prayed I wouldn't run into him, but also hoping I would. If I did though, I would fall. I would fall so hard again that it would lead me back to nothing, to what I once started with. But, it could also lead me back to something. Something so beautifully evil, so well crafted, that it could shed light on even the darkest parts of a forest.

I prayed.

"My neighbors think I'm crazy, but they don't understand"

It must be quite the shocker for my neighbors to see me leave the house willingly, since I had no school and only went out when I literally had no trace of food in all of my house. They probably think I'm crazy, and to be honest with myself, I probably am.

I don't know where exactly I'm going, but I continue walking, and I'm not sure if it is aimlessly or not. I walk until I appeared to be in the middle of a shopping center. There are so many people, so many faces. And yet, none of them are him.

So, to reiterate my point, he is so far, far away. But I want to find him, I need to find him.

"You're all I had, you're all I had"

I need to put myself back together. I can't just keep living like this, because if I never find him, I will have nothing; just like I've always had. So, if I'm able to survive this long without anything, who says I couldn't continue living like this? Most sane people probably, like the people passing me by in the shopping center. But then again, only a sane person could fix themselves.

I don't know what I was doing for most of the day, because I'm usually in a haze of my dark thoughts and mind. And by the time I become aware again, it seems like I stood in the very spot I started in; the middle of this shopping center, except that it was night. And as I start to move my body to finally return home, I swear I see him.

I don't want to see him, but I can't help to not see him again. It's impossible anyway. He is as far away from me as the moon.

I return home.

"At night when the stars light up my room I sit by myself talking to the moon"

I sit by the edge of my bed alone, looking down at my floor. It's brightly lit by the stars, since the only form of lighting came from the huge window that took up a whole wall in my room. I usually keep the curtains closed during the day as to always leave me in the dark, but I open them at night so I can talk to my only source of hope; the moon.

Sometimes I wonder if he really is up there. If he talks right back to me but I just can't hear him. I wonder if he's just as desperate to find me as I am with him. I talk about this with the moon, asking all these questions I may never get answers to. I express to the man on the moon how much I really miss him.