Our Little Cherry Blossoms

twelve. tired

ＪＡＮＵＡＲＹ (( ＣＡＳＥ ))

Valerie's hand squeezed mine as we stood before the barrier between us and our class. I was convinced that for anyone else, her touch would've been an alleviating soft cushion, but to me it was as if a collection of skewers and pins were etching their way into the flesh of my palm, forcefully carving its shape to fit hers. Flinching slightly, I suppressed a subsequent shudder of malaise and stiffened my hand, casting a fraught smile towards her admittedly charming eyes. She's confident, popular and beautiful, what am I feeling uncomfortable for? I thought in scepticism, only to be interrupted by the stridulant racket of hinges squealing against each other as the door opened.

My heart skidded to a staggering halt as soon as I laid eyes on the figure in front of me. Lark. Her once luscious, viridescent lanterns had now dimmed to a glaucous flicker, as if on the verge of plummeting into the abyss. I lowered my head reticently, ridiculously conscious of the fierce pang in my chest which goaded my heart to continue beating in spite of the spasms it dragged along.

"Case?"

Valerie's breathy murmur of concern tenderly stroked my earlobe, though it never touched my twisted, tangled thoughts. For the remainder of the day, I chuckled along with my friends' vivacious guffaws and Valerie's opulent simpers, yielding to her subtle demands for affection. The day then trudged to its debilitated end, and no words could describe the immense lassitude that had accumulated in my frigid body. The grief of incessantly witnessing Lark's winsome features contorted into embodiments of despondent shadows as well as the officious warmth from Valerie's persona was simply too much for me to handle all at once. I plodded my way back home through the piled white powder that had fallen seamlessly throughout the morning, and, liberating a tremendous sigh, crumpled onto the sheets of my bed. The little mousy bird that I'd come to yearn for had flown far, far out of my reach, vanishing into the inky mist that smeared the borders of my vision.

There was no chance of ever finding her.

Instead, I granted Valerie's blazing gaze to finally deluge my thoughts, yet I had never felt so empty in my life.