my poems

the moment i knew i was in love

it is 2:32 in the morning and i am scared to sleep. i had a dream that you left me, as you always promised to never do, for another girl. for my best friend. you simply thought it was 'okay' to be talking to someone when we have been together this long. it confused me, as you always said you only wanted me. i told you that it's not okay and it's her or me...you said "great! i'm gonna go call her." and ended our call. my heart shattered like a mirror that had just been thrown on the ground, but in that moment i knew you wouldn't have even put THAT much effort in and you made me second guess everything you did, not even caring enough to rip my heart out and tear it in pieces and explain WHY. you made me do it. you made all the thoughts fluttering around in my mind do it and rip my insides and hurt me and make me cry so hard i felt like puking. i called you and made you promise not to leave me for another girl. that's got to be the worst kind of pain. when he tells you "yeah, someone is better" but doesn't explain how. thoughts scurry inside your body scratch scratch scratching against your heart and cutting your lumgs wide open, because you don't KNOW why. as painful as that dream was, and though i feel the tears, in my throat, threatening my eyes to come pouring out leaving my pillow sopping wet; right now, i know for sure, i am in love with you and i never, never want to be without you.

p.s. please don't leave me