It all started when I was 12..
We were all gathered around the dining table. Me, mum and dad. They were acting strangely quiet. They looked at each other throughout the whole meal but didn't say a thing as if they were telepathic. It was freaking me out and making me curious as to what was happening. I hated things being hidden from me.
Dad had to go to the doctors today he said it was just a check up for his cold. This was weird, dad had been feeling ill for ages now and he would frequently visit the doctors but would not get better when he gets home. Mum has been extra caring too him and every night when were all asleep I could hear her faint crying downstairs but I don't know why...
Dad hasn't been going to work either so were all relying on mum to provide for us.
After dinner I sat on dads lap he looked down at me and smiled. It wasn't his usual cheery, toothy smile it was now a thin lipped, weak smile he looked even more tired. His eyes were starting to sag and his hair was starting to fall out.
"Dad are you ok?" I asked him.
"Yes dear I'm fine...just feel sick."
"You've been feeling sick for ages dad you're never getting better lately." I whined.
He smiled down at me, "don't worry I'll get better for you."
He then hugged me tight and I hugged him back I looked at his face studying it again he may be getting older, hair may be falling out and he was getting skinnier too but he was still dad.
***********
I shuffled around the kitchen looking for something good to eat- something junky...
My parents were at the hospital again so it gave me at least two-hours to experience being home alone. I climbed on top of the counter and looked into the cupboard where I knew mum kept hidden sweets at the back of the cupboard. I felt for a tin of sweets but instead pulled out a letter.
It had the hospital's logo on it and was directed to my dad.
I was such a curious person. I was battling whether I should open it or not. It was so tempting... No matter how much I knew opening this letter was wrong curiosity took over me and I soon found myself wide eyes.
Dear Mr Fredrick Williams,
The tests results regarding your possibility of having cancer have been completed and we are unfortunate to tell you that you have been diagnosed with leukaemia.
Please contact the Hospital soon.
Cancer...
My father had cancer and they hid it away from me.
Questions. Questions were running through my mind!
When was he diagnosed?!
Why didn't they tell me?!
Will he survive?!
...how long has he got left?
I felt the world spinning round and round I pushed my back against the wall for support...why?
Suddenly the door opened and in walked my parents. My mum clutching my dads arm supportively.
"Faith were-"
"WHY?!" I burst out loudly.
"Why would you keep something like this from me?!" I cried holding up the letter.
I looked at my parents they were pale. Eyes wide. None of then said a word to me.
"Well?" I asked waiting for an answer.
My dad sighed while my mum put a hand on his shoulder, "Darling are you ok?" She whispered to him.
He nodded weakly, "We need to tell her. We've hidden it from her a bit too long now."
My dad started walking to the sofa and sat down with my mum beside him. I sat awkwardly on the single sofa opposite them.
There was a silence until my dad finally spoke, "Faith dear I have cancer. I've been diagnosed with this for about a year now."
How...how could I not have noticed that for the past year my dad had cancer.
"Why..why didn't you tell me?" I asked them still hurt.
"Your dad wanted to tell you but I said not now as we were afraid that you might take this the wrong way." My mum said.
"Dad.. I want you to survive but let's say if you don't. How long do you think you have left?" I asked, the last question was a tiny whisper.
My parents looked at eachother.
"About a year?"
365 days...
I nodded that was enough time to spend time with him. I would fulfil his dreams and make him happy when he dies.
During those 365 days I watched as my classmates started dating and I turned down every boy that asked me out. I stayed focus on my future that may be spent without my dad. Soon I started getting A* and almost everyone started calling me a nerd. Nobody knew what was happening apart from Hannah. She knew everything that was happening especially about my dad.
Sadly my dads day came earlier than expected and be died within 10 months. My mum was absolutely devastated and I remember her quitting work for about a year. It was hard. I heard her every night crying alone in the bed she used to share with dad.
I remember on dads burial day we were all gathered around the cemetery. Everyone dressed in black and crying as the priest blessed him once more for the journey. I caught a glimpse of my dad one last time before the coffin was shut and he was being buried six feet underground.
"Good Bye dad..until we meet again." I whispered and from then on I wasn't Faith the daddy's girl who would let everyone step on her. I was now Faith the girl who was going to hide her past and carry on a new future.
Ever since I met Mason he made me feel this unusual feeling that made me just feel different. I didn't feel so uptight and ever since I knew Mason I wasn't just living through life I was loving it!
