AN: This is not meant to offend anyone as this is an actual song from the Broadway musical and Broadway is kinda controversial so sorry.
Third Person POV
Vic ran into the courtroom holding a briefcase and dressed in his new outfit. Preciado looked up and he was genuinely shocked. "By god! Victor? Is that you?" Preciado asked. Vic nodded and said, "Kellin took me shopping." Preciado and Lynn nodded. "Victor, you look sharp." Preciado said in agreement. "Chalk one up for Kellin." Lynn said in approval of Vic's outfit.
Outside news reporters began reporting on the trial. "In day three of the Oliver Sykes murder trial, D.A. Bryan Stars has been grilling Alexa San Roman, Mister Sykes' pool girl, all morning. The waters could get dicey, let's hope the defense packed their floaties...Katie." A news reporter said putting a damper on Preciado's team. The defense attorney continued her questioning of the pool boy. "Which is why you should clarify for the court exactly what your duties were as pool boy." Alexa rolled her eyes.
"Cleaning the pool." She replied. Bryan held up something and said, "So, Ms. San Roman, could you explain to the court what Exhibit A is?" He opened his hand, revealing a tiny bikini. Kellin walked into the court at that moment, carrying his briefcase. "That was my uniform." He said rolling his eyes. "Was it Oliver's idea to have you wear this "uniform"?" Alexa nodded. "Yes." She said. "And could you please tell the court exactly what your relationship was to the defendant?" Bryan asked.
"Oliver and I were LOVERS." He said pointing to Oliver. The court gasped. "No further questions." Bryan said and Preciado looked worried. He leant over to Oliver and whispered, "He was your lover?" Oliver laughed. "Oh no. A Delta Nu would never sleep with a girl in a bikini! I just liked to watch her clean the filters...." Oliver said. "Unbelievable! You're all making me look like an ass up there!" Preciado said before walking up to the judge. "Your Honor! I request a 10-minute recess!" He said. Just then, Kellin's phone rings. He looks at the caller I.D. and says, "Excuse me. I'll take this outside." He runs out of the courtroom, phone in hand.
Preciado walked back over to the remaining interns. "Why didn't I know about this disaster?!" Preciado asked Oliver fuming. Vic tried to calm him down. "Alright, it is a set-back..." Preciado immediately cut him off and said, "It's motive, Victor." The judge banged the gavel granting the 10-minute recess. Everyone walked out of the courtroom. Kellin stood out in the lobby on the phone. "Tay, what's up?" Kellin asked as he played with one of the case files in his hand. "Kells, I just had to call and thank ya! The bend and snap worked! I may-a broke Jordan's nose, but I got to spend four and a half hours with him in the ambulance and at the ER! It was the most romantic time I ever had in my whole life!" Tay exclaimed.
"Oh, Taylor, that's so great! I told you the Bend and Snap is infallible unless the person is gay or someth-" He said cutting himself off. "Ohmigod. I've gotta go. Bye." Kellin said as he noticed Alexa standing around looking bored. "Bye." Tay said hanging up as Kellin dropped a case file on the floor. He did the Bend and Snap to pick it up. Alexa didn't bat an eye. Kellin ran back into the courtroom excitedly. "Watch this!" He said as he approached his legal team.
He dropped the case file and did the Bend and Snap again. "Did you see it?" Kellin asked after doing a perfect demonstration. "See what?" Preciado asked confused. "Maybe you should do it one more time." Justin said smiling slightly. "Please!" Lynn said laughing. "Alexa couldn't have had the affair with Oliver! I just did the Bend And Snap in front of her and nothing. Clearly she must be gay." Oliver decided to chime in his two cents. "Alexa did leave a Drake CD in the pool house once..." Justin shook his head.
"You want to out this girl on the stand? Kellin, that's crazy. You can't build a legal strategy on the... Bend and Snap. We need a defense, not a dance move." Justin said in disbelief. "So you think she's perjured herself. But you can't prove it. If you're wrong, we look desperate AND homophobic." Preciado said to Kellin. "But if he's right..." Tony said. "And I know I am! There right there! Look at that tan, well-tended skin! Look at the killer shape she's in! Oh please, she's gay, totally gay!" Kellin said.
Preciado shook his head at Kellin. "I'm not about to celebrate: every trait could indicate a totally straight expatriate. This girl's not gay. I say not gay." He said dismissing Kellin's point. "That is the elephant in the room. Well is it relevant to assume that a girl who wears cologne is automatically radically fey?" Lynn said. "But look at her coiffed and crispy locks." (AN: This is when Alexa had curly hair.) "Look at her silk translucent socks!" Vic said pointing to her shoes.
Preciado interrupted the both of them by saying, "There's the eternal paradox: Look what we're seein'..." Tony looked at Alexa confused. "What are we seein'?" He said. "Is he gay..." Preciado started before Kellin interrupting him. "Of course he's gay!" Preciado waited for Kellin's outburst to end before saying, "Or European!" (AN: Yes I know Alexa San Roman is not European. Work with me here.) The whole legal team froze before saying, "OHHHH!"
"Gay or European? It's hard to guarantee; is he gay or European?" Tony, Justin and Lynn said before Vic, Tony and Lynn turned towards Justin. "Well hey, don't look at me..." He said. "You see they bring their boys up dif'rent in those charming foreign ports; they play peculiar sports, in shiny shorts or tiny shorts." Tony said looking over at Alexa. "Gay or foreign fella? The answer could take weeks! They both say things like "Ciao Bella" while they kiss you on both cheeks!" Lynn joined in. "Oh please." Kellin said completely bored.
"Gay or European? So many shades of gray. Depending on the time of day, the French go either way." Justin said, receiving a smack from Tony. "Is he gay or European, or..." Vic began but Lynn cut him off. "There! Right There! Look at that condescending smirk! Seen it on every girl at work! That is a metro het'ro jerk. This girl's not gay. I say no way." Vic shook his head and began again, "That is the elephant in the room! Well is it relevant to presume that a hottie in that costume." Tony continued by saying, "Is automatically radically..."
"Ironically chronically..." Preciado continued. "Certainly flirtin'ly." Lynn continued on once again. "Genetically medically..." Justin said as we all watched Alexa flirt with a girl. "Gay! Offically Gay! Swishily Gay Gay Gay Gay..." Alexa then turned to the other side and began batting her eyelashes at a girl. "Dammit!" We all said in unison.
"So stylish and relaxed." Preciado remarked. "But they bring their boys up different there; it's cultur'lly diverse. It's not a fashion curse if she wears a kilt or bears a messenger bag." Tony said. "Gay or just exotic? I still can't crack the code!" Justin said studying Alexa. "Yeah, her accent is hypnotic but her shoes are pointy-toed." Oliver joined in. We all turned our heads to stare at Alexa. Vic pushed through us and stared her up and down.
"Wait a minute! Give me a chance to crack her. I've an idea I'd like to try." Vic said and Preciado pointed to the stand. "The floor is yours." Preciado said and Vic walked up to the stand. "So Ms. San Roman, this alleged affair with Mr. Sykes has been going on for...?" Vic asked. "Two years." She responded sassily. "And your first name again is...?" Vic questioned. "Alexa." She said, rolling her eyes. "And your girlfriend's name is...?" Vic said and Alexa responded, "Cacie." She said. (AN: I don't know if they're actually dating until Alexa or Cacie confirms anything but in my story they are.) Gasps broke out in the courtroom.
"Sorry, I misunderstand. You say "girlfriend". I thought you say "best friend." Cacie is my "best friend." Alexa said trying to save herself. A petite blonde stood up in the back of the courtroom and said, "You bastard! You lying bastard! That's it! I no cover for you no more! Peoples! I have big announcement!" Cacie said walking up towards Alexa. "This girl is gay AND European! And neither is disgrace! You gotta stop your bein' a completely closet case! It's Me not Him she's seein', no matter what she say! I swear she never ever ever swing the other way! You are so gay, you big parfait, you flaming one-girl cabaret!" Cacie said staring Alexa down.
"I'm straight!" Alexa said. "You were not yesterday..." Cacie whispered to Alexa who immediately blushed. "So if I may, I'm proud to say she's gay!" "And European!" Preciado's internship responded. "Fine okay I'm gay!" Alexa proclaimed. "Hooray!" The legal team cheered. "Fine okay we're gay!" Alexa and Cacie said together.
AN:
This chapter was one of the hardest to do.
Mainly because I'm watching The Patch (which is a Roosterteeth show. I'm RT trash.) and Meg Turney and Ryan Haywood are so distracting.
Okay. I love you!
Bye!
