Coming Home

Why Baby Why?

Your suitcase is gone, with all of your things
Our old picture frames are empty
I burned all your letters, I took off your ring
But what can I do with these memories
Keeping me up 'til the dawn, hanging on like you're coming back
But you ain't coming back
---

She doesn't know if she's doing the right thing.

If leaving Clark and sacrificing her heart for her family was the best solution.

But after months of hearing him say "It's over" even if what she really wanted was to hear him say "I'd wait", she finally came to realize that Clark's ultimatum was more of a speech about how he's given up, rather than him voicing out his frustrations so that they can work their relationship out.

In the end, she can only beg and grovel and plead so much but his mind was already set, she was left with no other choice and so, she went.

After all, there was her family to think about (they need the money, Nanang's very sick) and she had to do it for herself to be able to start all over in order to forget that she was left behind by the only man she's ever loved her whole life, ever.

In the beginning it was not that bad because the move to another country, a new job and a new apartment was a welcome distraction.

After all, there were paper works to fill, requirements to complete and contractors to meet, but at night?

At night, the pain is so intense and their memories so vivid, It was that devastating, she feels as if she has stopped breathing.

---

It was only Tita Jack who knows how much Simon's offer for her to move to LA had her heart breaking.

She was the only person she told because a lot of people outside her family has now painted her as the bitch who broke Clark's heart but she's glad that at least she has her.

"O, kamusta?"

She asked from the other end of the line when she was moving in and she was busy unpacking all her things, her call couldn't having had come at a much more unfortunate timing.

"Ok naman po Tita. Ok po ako."

She replied.

Though her voice belies her words and the older woman can tell even from across the miles that she is anything but.

She chose to pretend that she didn't hear it though.

She focuses instead on telling her about all the things that are going on at home and how everybody was faring.

However, habit is such a funny thing because without even thinking, the next words out of her mouth were all about Clark and how he's been doing.

" - He's coping, you know. Pero ngayon lagi na lang syang galit at iritable. Ni ayaw nga nya na -"

She caught herself midsentence and chastises herself for putting her foot in her mouth.

It was a little too late though.

The air of awkwardness between them was already so thick there was only dead silence when she finally stopped talking.

That is, until Leah started crying.

Great, heaving sobs that seemed to come from deep within her very soul that even if Tita Jack was just listening to her from her side of the world, it seemed to also grip her heart, it sort of also crushed her.

"Leah, pasensya na, I- I didn't mean to! I'm sorry..."

She said.

Partly in sympathy and partly in embarrassment at being so tactless.