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All My Friends Are Gay (Persona 4)

Ships: Souji/Yosuke, Chie/Yukiko, Kanji/Naoto, Rize/Kanami, Kou/Daisuke
Summary: Yosuke slowly realises that none of his friends are anywhere near as straight as he clearly is.
Requested by: Me. Aka myself. In some cases, known well as the author. Consistently referred to as a loser.

Yosuke Hanamura, if in a situation where he is required to describe his sexuality, would pinpoint it as being Very Straight. He is so Very Straight that whenever anyone suggests differently, he'd sit up stiffer than he does when he's idly staring at the back of Souji's head and the teacher calls his name. He is absolutely unbendable. He talks about girls and how Very Straight he is for almost all hours of the day.

Some doubt his straightness, claiming that he spends far too much time with the transfer student to prove that no, he doesn't go down on the guy behind closed doors and that they're best friends, so it's extra gross. Plus, Yosuke is straight and Souji is, too. Clearly, nothing is happening.

The obvious conclusion, Yosuke decides, is that he hasn't had a girlfriend while in Inaba. Obviously, no one would question his sexuality if he had a girl on his arm at most times, so he makes it his main goal besides solving the murder case.

Needless to say, a girl he barely knows would be bad, as she could turn out to be some kind of psychopath. Needless to say, he has few options.

...

He tries Chie, first, knowing full well that Yukiko would say no or possibly punch him in the face or maybe even set him on fire. That would not be pleasurable.

Determined to get himself a girl, even if she is possibly the least desirable girl in the whole of Inaba, he knocks on the door, expecting Chie to open it wearing some form of training get up or whatever the hell she wears in her spare time, probably confused upon seeing him and debating whether or not an impromptu visit warrants a swift kick or not.

When Yukiko answers with a slightly flushed face and messed up hair and clothes, Yosuke is not prepared.

She tilts her head and frowns, "Yosuke? What are you doing here? Chie said she was going to be alone today."

Yosuke shrugged, "Does me being here look planned to you?"

"The only place you ever go without prior warning that I know of is the Dojima residence."

Yosuke is about to speak when Yukiko gasps dramatically.

"Unless- Don't tell me, you and Souji are having a domestic, so you--"

"Geez, no!" Groans Yosuke before sighing and coving his face with one hand, "Is it so wrong to want to hang with someone that isn't partner?"

Yukiko pauses, face falling naturally into a sweet smile with debatable intentions, "Well, Chie can't see you right now. She and I are very busy doing girl things."

He huffs, "It wouldn't even take that long! All I was gonna do is ask her out and then leave! You can get back to your girl stuff then!"

Yukiko freezes. It takes a few moments of Yosuke pouting impatiently before she breaks, falling to her knees and laughing like a mad man. Yosuke stares at her like she is a mad man.

"Wh-What's so funny about me wanting a girlfriend?!" He yells indignantly.

"Oh- Oh, Yosuke, t-there's nothing wro-wrong with that, it's just--" She bursts into another wave of laughter, louder this time."