My life was just beginning to feel good. I know this story will be cheesy, and people will tell me im too young to feel the way i feel. But im a young teenager, and i'm probably not going to listen to you anyways. My name is Lilia (lily-uh), and i am 13 going on 14.
I lived in Ohio for 7 years with my mom, stepdad, little brother, little sister, older sister, a step sister who came to my house every other weekend, and my mom's parents. Ya, ik alot of people. But heres the catch, alllll of us only lived in 2 apartments. My grandparemts and i in apartment 230, and the rest of my family in apartment 231.
We spread out to have more room. But then my mom finally stuck to the idea of moveing down to texas. She didnt know where, but she knew she was gonna go.
I was going out with my on again off again boyfriend, and we didnt even make it a full month untill we broke up for the second time in the ending of 7th grade. I fell into devistation. I thought i was in love with him. Looking back im not too sure anymore. That'll be explained later.
But i fell into a depression. (It didnt help that i already had depression due to it running on my mom's side of the family) i couldn't sleep, couldnt eat. He abandoned our luch table and made me feel like i was bad to him but wasnt.
Then i asked one of our friends to help me make him jelous (this friend was a guy) and if my ex got jelous then he still liked me, and if not then oh well. I just couldnt get over all the mixed signal this ex was giving off.
Then, my ex found out about this 'plan' that never took effect. We got into an argument over text message and i was an even worse of a wreak then ever. My friends would watch me cry at lunch and wouldnt know the reason why. I never made jokes anymore. They just knew i wasnt okay. But could assume why.
Then, this ex who had been my best friend, better than any of the girls, started twisting up words from our conversations and started spreading rumors about me, and laughing and pointing at me with his friends. He became a total jerk. I started to feel harrassed and got knots in my stomic to even step foot in school.
With not being on any antidepressants at the time, i didnt know how to cope other than to cut. I didnt know of any other people doing this except for one. And they all called her 'attention seeking' and 'a fake' and 'annoying'.... The list goes on.
So to hide from all that i cut on my hips and thighs. I told no one to avoid any more form of bulling. I became skinnier due to getting an upset stomic because of stress, and not being able to finnish my food without getting nauseous. I couldnt focus on school; i was too tired because of being anxious all night long about what would come the next day.
As the end of the year came, i decided i didnt want this carring with me unsolved to my new start in life. I apologized to my ex, as did he. We made up but things were not the same. School was still alittle bit akaward, and i got picked on a few times here and there. I was upset about having to leave my family, and my bestfriends behind in ohio.
And not to mention my dad lived 2 hrs away in indiana, and i'd be all the way acrossed the country from him. We are close, even though my parents are divorced. Even my mom and stepdad are good friends with him. My dad will cook for my family, and my stepdad and him will have a beer while watching sports. I am lucky this has happened.
I remember my old friend lacey told me "Mabye this move to Texas will be good for you. Because no offense, but you have been nothing but a wreck this whole school year." Wont forget her saying that.
Finally comes the last day of school. Not alot of people said goodbye. I sat alone by myself on the bus. No one really bothered to say goodbye to me there either. Only one person really said goodbye to me, and that was on the bus. He asked for a hug when my stop came.
I used to hate his guts. But he really came around to be a good friend for me. And honestly, he was one of the last people i would except to cry over me leaving, and then give me a hug too. Great friend.
My mom finally decided to go to beaumont Teaxas along lines of allll the school drama. So when it was the weekend after 7th grade ended, we started to pack our bags. I remeber loading the moving truck with all our stuff from dusk to dawn. There was a full moon that night. Dark cloudy sky. Beautiful and breezy. Then, when we were all loaded, away we went. Kissing goodbye all of our fondest memories in hopes for new ones. And away Toledo Ohio went.
