Altschmerz (Undertale Fanfiction)

Altschmerz

n. Weariness with the same old issues that you've always had—the same boring flaws and anxieties you've been gnawing on for years.

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"HALT, HUMAN!"

Sans stood idle by a tree, seeing everything yet unseen by the two figures facing each other not too far off. His hood was pulled up to ward off the chilling wind, eyes vacant and calculating as the human took a few steps towards his brother.

"H-HEY, QUIT MOVING WHILE I'M TALKING TO YOU!" Papyrus barked as he struggled to stand his ground. As small as the human was compared to him, there was a sinister air about them that made his bones rattle. "I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, HAVE SOME THINGS TO SAY."

They paused for a moment, as if contemplating, and the taller skeleton took the opportunity to continue his tirade. "FIRST: YOU'RE A FREAKING WEIRDO! NOT ONLY DO YOU NOT LIKE PUZZLES. BUT THE WAY YOU SHAMBLE ABOUT FROM PLACE TO PLACE, THE WAY YOUR HANDS ARE ALWAYS COVERED IN DUSTY POWDER..."

Papyrus's expression grew morose, a side of him that Sans rarely saw under normal circumstances. But then again...

"IT FEELS...LIKE YOUR LIFE IS GOING DOWN A DANGEROUS PATH."

...These aren't exactly normal circumstances, are they?

"HOWEVER! I, PAPYRUS, SEE GREAT POTENTIAL WITHIN YOU!" Papyrus grinned, his cape fluttering dramatically in the breeze. "EVERYONE CAN BE A GREAT PERSON IF THEY TRY AND ME, I HARDLY HAVE TO TRY AT ALL!"

The tall skeleton guffawed like his regular self, arms akimbo and shoulders shaking slightly. Sans had seen this scene play out enough times to know that the laugh was forced. The human's expression shifted into irritation and they took another step forward, apparently tired of him running his mouth.

Papyrus stopped laughing abruptly and actually did flinch back a step. He quickly regained his composure, but the slight tremor in his frame persisted.

"H-HEY, QUIT MOVING! THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I AM TALKING ABOUT!" Papyrus crossed his arms, determined to end the human's rampage right then and there. He was always so quick to forgive... "HUMAN! I THINK YOU ARE IN NEED OF GUIDANCE!"

"Come on, Papyrus..." Sans murmured softly. But he knew exactly how this would turn out, "Get out of there."

"SOMEONE NEEDS TO KEEP YOU ON THE STRAIGHT AND NARROW!" Papyrus continued, unaware of his brother's silent begging. "BUT WORRY NOT! I, PAPYRUS, WILL GLADLY BE YOUR FRIEND AND TUTOR! I WILL TURN YOUR LIFE RIGHT AROUND!"

What a joke.

"I SEE YOU ARE APPROACHING. ARE YOU OFFERING A HUG OF ACCEPTANCE?"

He looked so hopeful. So happy that he could help.

"WOWIE!! MY LESSONS ARE ALREADY WORKING!!"

But in the end...

"I, PAPYRUS, WELCOME YOU WITH OPEN ARMS!"

From where he was standing, Sans could faintly see the human's fist clench and unclench repeatedly. The internal battle between the demon and his dear friend was visible through the minute shifts in their expression. He had watched the same battle so many times that he wasn't surprised to see who had won.

So many times that when Papyrus' head was severed and his younger brother was reduced to a pile of dust scattering in the wind, he didn't react.

Chara looked up and briefly locked into Sans' blank gaze. With a small smile, they slowly ground their boots into his dust until it was indistinguishable from the half-melted snow and the orange cape he left behind was soaked through with it. They looked almost disappointed when it barely roused a reaction from the remaining skeleton brother.

It was a few minutes after Chara moved on ahead when Sans finally moved from his spot. His shoes crunched softly in the snow as he bent down to retrieve Papyrus' cape as he had countless times before, letting the melted snow leak through his phalanges.

A few resets ago, Sans wondered why he felt nothing as he watched his brother die. What kind of brother was he, when he barely even blinked when Papyrus' head fell from his shoulders? When all he felt as his only family dissolved into dust was...

...Tired?

The idea that he grew numb after watching it happen so many times had terrified him, and he found himself not being able to meet Papyrus' gaze for too long. How would he react, knowing that his own brother was indifferent about his death?

But Papyrus didn't know about the resets. Didn't know the pain of putting up a fight that would be useless in the end, then repeating it over and over until the death and destruction became a tedious routine. Perhaps he did, but he had always been the more resilient one out of the two.

Sans looked down at the stained orange fabric for a moment before letting it fall from his hand and back into the dust-saturated slush. He found himself thinking that maybe what he wasn't feeling was for the best. As selfish as it sounded, at least it took the edge off of the taxing job that he had been bestowed upon.

Taking one last look at the cape soaking up muddy water on the ground, Sans turned around and walked ahead, intent on making up for lost time.