Sing me to sleep

When all hope is lost

'Ladies and Gentleman, welcome to the Seoul Incheon International Airport'. The unpredicted voice of the hushed blonde air hostess emerged after a dragging journey of echoing silence. As I managed to stand up, i clenched onto my handbag, sweat rolling down my spine within every step I took down the daunting aisle. I could feel her presence. Their presence - sniggers expressing at my mocking, I pretend I don't hear it, pretend that it doesn't bother me or effect me; but the truth is it tears me apart.

As we depart the aircraft, I inhale and rejoice my very first breath of Korea - the thick air lurking with a stench of humidity and kerosene in the muggy atmosphere. As I saunter down the stairs, anxiously making sure to prevent any fall of the sort, I contemplate of the spirit among the next fortnight...it was sure to be unpleasant considering the people who would neighbour me during the travel. Yet, I still comprise onto optimism and hope - who knows perhaps the experience will be rather riveting...

As the shuttle bus directs us to the building of the airport, I reach for my belongings swiftly, intending to evade contact with them. As the bus hails to a stop, I follow the direction of my tutor and I duck my head down -allowing myself indistinguishable among the hordes of Asian people -facing the immaculate marble of the airport's ground. 'Gather around girls' Mrs Hunter's voice vociferates across the swarm of people as our class easily manages to locate our scabby teacher. She exclaims to our class in a scoldingly manner that we are granted thirty minutes to survey the building and acquaint ourselves with the foreign ambience. As she dismisses us, I continue to occupy my low key appearance. Speedily, I pace towards the first shop that strikes me; a brightly illuminated beauty cosmetics store. Instantly, the flamboyant colours capture my attention - the saleswomen welcome me in such embracing aura. 'Ann-yeong-haseyo madam'. I turn to find a pretty petite lady of about twenty years offering to recommend some complimenting lip colours. I ponder for a second coming to realisation of my vacant half an hour. 'Yes please' My introverted character is evidently exposed to the woman and oh gosh, I feel the warmth of the vivid pink colour flaunting my cheeks revealing upon my face - a flaw that Amber agonises me about. Speaking of which, as the woman hand-picks some crimson tones, I spot her. She finds me. A humming bird attempts to escape from my chest as it pounds rapidly striking a wave of nausea - no, not again. Racing into the store, wild red hair flying behind, she positions her large self, towering over me. 'Ma'am, would you like some help' the saleswoman responds, evidently intimidated by Amber's figure. 'Oh no, not at all, I've just found my friend over here, you seemed to have distracted her while we were looking for her.' She replies in a fake high-pitched voice. Just then the force of her monstrous fingers propel me out of the store leaving me breathless; I see the Korean women in the store worriedly staring beyond, but just then my sight of them is blocked as the group encircles me in the manner of vultures brawling over dead meat. Struck with hysteria, Amber says 'Did you honestly think that you could get away from us that easily after what you did to Amaara on the plane'. I look to my left, there she stands with Abby, arms crossed in distaste. With a sly expression, Sara speaks up. 'You're disgusting, a disgrace. Why did you bother coming on this trip when you know you're a burden to us and everyone else. Ugh, how do you have the nerves to even show that nasty face of yours after what happened between you and Lucas.' That triggered it. The Emotions and the memories poured back in and my face tinged distinctly redder than usual. 'Haha her face - it's doing that weird thing again' Abby chuckled as she drew attention to my discomfiture. Four large claws pointed directly at my face until Amber's fingers fisted and suddenly thrashed my red cheeks. Taken aback, I jolted to the floor, harshly grazing my elbows. I sense the wondrous eyes of strangers resting upon me. A dark figure, which appears to be Sara's, approaches my arched body and slashes my clothes as they tear into fragments. I yelp in panic - it only triggers Amber's cruel intentions; she moves behind me and yanks my long hair. My vision, although blurred, shows me that individuals seem to be wrenching the pair away from me. I feel hands reaching to support me for comfort, but regardless of their sympathy, it is unnecessary - all I desire is peace, at the ultimate, something I had been speculating on a lot recently. What was the point when everything around you evolved around rejection, anguish and harassment. The trauma felt was indescribable. As Korean voices questioned, I made myself oblivious to all and allowed myself to be picked up from the cold marble. 'Oh my god, Hana!' Amaara screeched in shock as she held her hands out. Just then, the combination of scalding tears and blood streaming down my cheeks were immediately swiped away as I dashed through the airport leaving behind my woes. As my careless, now messy hair dances along with the beat of the air, I identify a tall physique behind...I continue my sprint. The play of air among my mouth fails me and I find myself breathless hastening up the escalators - still I detect the person's presence; I conclude that it is either Sara or Amber. As I reach the higher floor, I don't even think of resting my scamper. Minutes pass until I am satisfied with the length travelled and the distance between myself and the figure is adequate; I decide on halting at the sharp peak of the balcony near the unoccupied bench. Here, there isn't a person in sight which is convenient. As I inhale a huge gulp of air, I rest my blood-stained hands upon the firm banister. Here, is an ideal place; feelings of melancholy, which have been oppressed leak out of my damp, watery eyes but it'll all be over soon enough... I use my quivering hands to support my weight over the railing as I smoothly climb over and ponder for minutes until a soft hand places over mine- I don't look back. A deep masculine voice emerges 'So much pain I saw in such youthful eyes'. The hand glides through my fingers and clasps hold onto them, I feel strong veins. 'Hold onto life, the way I hold onto your precious fingers'. I shrug all feelings of fondness away, ignore him, despite the sparks I feel with his moving hands. The sustainability to restrain my solemn tears fail as I sob once again 'Nobody c-cares'. Just then his tender fingers slide to my waist and tightly wrap around. 'I do' his words whisper against my neck. That provoked my vexation - how dare he. 'I haven't even seen your face and you're telling me you care? Just take a look at my position do you think I'm awaiting my fate for a stranger to come and tell me he gives a damn when everyone I seem to love doesn't give a single shit about me an..' My voice brakes just then from the tears but abruptly his palms grasp onto my thighs and his strength manages to rotate my body, facing me towards him. As he removes my quavering fingers away, one by one from my snivelling face, I'm enabled to see his appearance: a fine Korean man appearing to be of eighteen years. It was him, only his beaming eyes weren't the ones I recognised, instead teary, with his face low-spirited. Hiding his face, shaking with tears, with his head rest low, he buried his mahogany head full of hair into my torn woollen sweater- his shivering hands firmly gripped around my torso. 'Please' he whispered gently as he wept, 'Don't leave'.