Enter if you dare!!

Where I LIVE!!

I live in my books; ever since I was a little girl I been in love with books. Not just any books more like sci – fi, fantasy and fiction. 

I never wanted to read something that was real because I didn't like my reality and knowing that someone body else reality was better is not how I wanted my childhood to go like that. I love my books, every good book I read; I just like to pretend that's my life and i'm living in that book. 

Most of the time, I just wish my life was a book. The author planned of the book made my life terrible to see when I would crack and give up on life. 

Well it work I crack and i'm not happy anymore and I really to give up on life. I wish that my life was a book then hopefully the author would feel bad and want to change my life. 

My mother tells; me if I was feeling sad, mad, or bad that I should pray. Well you see, my whole family is religious and I'm not. The moment when I felt sad, mad, and bad nobody was there. My mom always: say that God always come and he never to early or to late. 

But I disagree with that, because when I needed someone the most. Nobody was ever there, I was alone and I don't know when someone was suppose to come but I wish someone did at that moment. 

I just stop believing and the only thing that I could really think about is being in a book. I pretend all the time, even though it's pretty pathetic.

 I do pretend that I'm apart of that book, that I'm related to the main character or that I'm someone important in the story. 

I write out little short stories about the book I read with me in them. This is my only way to escape reality. It's the only way I know how, when I read books and write out my stories is when I feel free. 

All my problems are suddenly lifted off my shoulders. It's hard to pretend to be happy all the time and every day. Soooooo... I found a way to escape without leaving the world for good. 

Before I go, I just wanted to say that I'm not the best at grammar or spelling. SOOOO... Don't judge me - Judge your mom. 

                                                                                                                  Until to next time my pretty                                                                                                                                                       Peace out girl scout                                                                                                                                                                                        ~ G

P.S I don't like myself, so every time I write someone. I have to give myself a compliment so when I come back and re- read this. I will most likely feel like I'm such a dysfunctional person so the compliments give me this very little tiny reminder that I'm not. 

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Music by Ruth B, titled Lost Boy. One of my favorite songs. She's awesome!! .... Sorry It took my so long to post this. At my school we just took midterms and it was a big stress test. I had a test in every class. But now I'm going to be able to post more often. Until next time! Sorry that this chapter was so short, my week at school has been terrible. I will make the next ch longer. Peace - out girl scouts!! ;)