Poems and Short Stories

Broken

To whom ever will listen,

How am I supposed to feel?

 He broke up with me the day that I was going to tell him that I loved him. That I still love him. But I guess that doesn't matter anymore... Knowing that he doesn't want to try and work out our problems is one of the worst things in the world. He gave up on me.

He wants to be just friends, but how can I be friends with someone so perfect, so wonderful? It hurts to even look at him sometimes because I remember every moment, the good and the bad and I cry. 

He messaged me late at night while I was sleeping. I woke up to check if he finally answered my message, and saw the devastating news. He decided that he was too "busy" for me and that the best choice would be to go our separate ways. Little did he know, that night I cried myself to sleep after half an hour of crying and waking up my brother.

Going to school the next day was one of the hardest things I've ever done. Feeling so vulnerable, I sat in the corner listening to the most depressing music that I could find and cried. He walked in the room, saw me and walked out. It was as if he was walking out of my life. No matter what I did that day all that I could think about was him. His arms around my waist, my hands in his hair. Connected as if we were one being.

He walked around the school with his new girl on his arm while I stayed in the shadows. I didn't want him to see how truly hurt I was. Seeing him with her in his arms tears me apart every time. 

He never noticed how truly insecure I am. Which didn't surprise me because nobody else has either. I always held back because I was terrified that he would leave me because I wasn't good enough, or that I wasn't attractive enough. Little did I know, that by doing so I was driving a wedge between the two of us.There are so many troubles that I have towards relationships that it would take hours to talk about them all. It goes all the way back to when I was merely 2 years old.

He wants to be friends, but I am not yet ready to give him the chance. I need time before I can be friends with someone that I love with my whole being. I'm not sure if I will ever be able to be friends with him again. Only time will tell.

Always waiting,

Anonymous

P.S.

I will always wait for you. No matter what we go through. Wherever you are. I will love you forever.