the weed-tree fic

"pull harder jishwa"

okay so one day, SpookY jim wAs with hIs fren Tyjo broseph and weRe walking iN the woods with they"rE car radio. tyJo was like "hOLy shiT duDE". And then SpookY jim said "WhUt" tHEN they SAW wEED CUmming FRom the tREES..

"PULL HARDER JOSH"

"I'M TRYING TOO!"

He GroanEd harder as Josh pUlled it with great force

"THEN PULL IT MORE"

"LET ME HELP YOU"

"UGH"

"PSHSSHSP"

"ALMOST THEY'RE"

"I SEE IT! IT'S CUMMING OUT"

"WHA-WHAT THE HELL WHY IS IT GREEN??11!"

"EW"

"YOU PULLED TOO HARD YOU UNCULTURED SWINE"

"bUt Dude..."

"what??"

"that's a pretty big size tho."

"bigger than obama's? ;););)"

"omg ggGG totally!11!"

"but no homo tho."

"well then"

when they were DUN pulling the bigbomb weed that was cumming from the trees, thEy examined it. It measured exactly 69 feet. wowza!! tyjo was busy writing poetry shit in his secret notebook so jishwa left him. jishwa doesn't no why tyjo keeps it as a "secret" cos i mean like they're totally best frens write!?? and their totes dating obviously (dont sue be obama lolol)

spooky jim walked to the creek and saw a big big cave. inside the cave was a smol turtle. the next day there was bomb, and then the turtle blew Up!1! such tragic. much blowjobs :((

Okie but anyways there was dis bIg bIG thing in the wall that says "D U N". WhaT the wiggleworms is that!!? How do they no jishwa' name? Is satan in there?? :O Holy fudgeworms, he said as he walked away from the cave. he kept on walking until he sees the place where tyjo and and him saw the weeds cumming from them trees. from know on, jishwa called them "weed trees" apparently tyjo wasn't their. but jishwa did he see his poetry book. "what could go wrong if i peaked a lil?" he said in his smol brain that's currently 50% high and 60% filled with weed. o h no! that's 130%! dang nuggets! he opened the book and ...

dun dUN DUN!!!

THERE WAS A FRIGGIN SHREK SMUT!! WHAT THE WIGGLEWORMS??

spooky jim shrugged, and thought "lolz he's so productive. aww. he's sweet. he's already writing our new album "shrek and minion yaoi"

he read the lyrics:

"help me stripdance, help me me stripdance, help me down, those shreks is where i'll be stripping all my weed"

wow!! 11 such inspiring. much delightful.

tyjo wasn't still here so jish flipped sum more pages in the book. he saw a page that says "DO NOT EAT!!" aww silly tyjo. why would i eat the book anyways?? oh what a dork, jishwa smiled.

"GIT YER FILTHY HANDS OUT OF MEI BOOK YOU SON OF A DUN"

"whuT wot did i do? what"

"IT SAYS "DO NOT READ" YOU WIGGLEWORM DON'T READ IT. OH MY GOD I SWEAR YOU ARE HIGHER THAN LOUIS' DICK UP HARRY'S ASS JESUS HOLY HELL."

wait it did? ohhh no i see it. XD whoopsies!! "sorry bro" "It's alright bro" i was ashamed of myself, so I went to the corner of the the cave. why is he overprotective of his book? is he hiding something? IS HE SECRETLY FIONA AND HIS PLANNING TO FRICKLE FRACK SHREK?? OhmY gawD, josh wondered in his high thoughts.