Over the Edge

Ch.39-No More Fear

~Emmalyn~

I was lost.

I stood facing Rhys in the small bedroom, nervous and excited and so alive, all at once. There were so many pieces that still needed connecting, but the biggest one, the one that mattered, was right in front of me.

And he was whole, put together, sealed.

"Slowly," Rhys said, pushing the blouse off my shoulders. Goosebumps broke out along my exposed flesh. "Let's do this slowly."

Beyond talking, all I could do was nod. I trusted him. With everything in me, I trusted him. "I'm sorry," I apologized. "I'm sorry about everything--"

"No," he interjected. "Don't be sorry."

"But--"

"Shh." His breathed fanned out along my face. "Shut up, Emma."

So I did.

And when he broke those two inches of time and space and kissed me, he did more than that. He offered strength and support and the assurance that it was okay to be uncertain. It was okay not to be one hundred percent sure of who you were, and it was fine to be a little broken.

I clawed his shirt from his body, running my hands down his torso, feeling his heat and his warmth, and it was home. 

"Emma," he growled, hand fisting the hair at the back of my head, carnal and vicious in a way I knew I would love. I was fine shedding my inhibitions; blacking out the ugly parts I remembered to make room for the electrifying feel of Rhys. After all, life was about new memories, right? Even if I never regained some of my old ones, it would be okay, because I would always be making them new, every day, all the time. 

And I had to be okay with that. 

He wasn't Mike. There was no hidden agenda or ulterior motive. I knew that, through the hesitance and the fear and the apprehension. Enough that when the soft cushion of the mattress caught me as I fell through air, that it wasn't a hoax. Rhys's hands gripping my face and him kissing the ever loving daylights out of me wasn't a trick. It was all raw, and real, and I wanted it. 

Needed it.

"Why do you love me?" I managed the breath to ask, because I wanted to know. I wanted to hear him say it, to know the difference between him and my nightmare.

Rhys broke the kiss, leaving me gasping, face buried in the crook of my neck. "I love you because you're beautiful," he responded after a moment. "Because you smell like hope. Because your grey eyes undo me and I want to unlock every single secret behind them."

Tears slipped out before I could stop them. "You're not Mike."

He shook his head. "I'm not. I'm Rhys."

"You're not going to hurt me."

"I would never hurt you."

I licked my lips, releasing a deep breath. "I know that. I know that now."

"Good."

Rhys lowered down to his side, gazing lovingly at me, fingers trailing along my stomach. "I want to remember the rest," I spoke up, "but I don't, at the same time. I just wanted you, and now I have it." I closed my eyes. "I have you."

"You'll always have me."

"Don't imply promises you can't keep."

He chuckled. "Have faith."

"I do. In you."

Rhys rolled ontop of me, a wonderful shield against the outside world. For the moment it was just us, just him and me, and for as long as I could hold onto it, that was what I wanted.