Rogue (Supernatural) [Rogue Trilogy] {1}

13.5 - Dysfunctional

13.5 – Dysfunctional

We're in the clear, far away from the Abaddon-Crowley fiasco back at that warehouse. Dean escapes in the Impala, so he has to be happy to have his car back. My truck consists of Castiel, Sam, and myself.

Between Castiel and Sam, they tell me about Abaddon. How she's supposedly a Knight of Hell, which sounds way more dangerous than your average demon.

We've parked our vehicles on a long dock.

"Okay, easy, easy, don't take us down," I tell Sam as I help him out of my truck. I flinch at the sight of the red holes in my brother's head. Gadreel is gone from him. He won't be possessing my brother ever again.

The weather showers us with cold, pouring rain. I lean against my truck, shivering.

"I can't believe you're here, Jo-Jo," Sam pants.

I smile fondly. "I wouldn't abandon my little brother when he's possessed by an angel, now, would I?"

There's something on Sam's face that tells me he wants to say something, but he holds it back in. I have a feeling I know what he wants to say too. For our sake, I don't bring it up, and neither does he.

Castiel repairs the holes on my brother's head, making them nonexistent. I let Sam lean against me as I see him sway a bit. He's still not fully healed.

"You feel better?" I ask him warily.

"A little, yeah."

"It'll take time to fully heal you," says Castiel. "We'll have to do it in stages."

"So, does this mean I'm back to being my lonely self?" I joke. "I think I'll miss you, Castiel. Won't be the same."

"I thought you said..."

I bite my lip. Right. I had told Castiel that it was probably futile of me to resist the family business calling me back. "It's still up for debate."

But Castiel and I both know I'm lying. The only person I could probably fool about that is Sam.

Dean walks through the rain, looking apprehensive, reserved. We all fall into silence.

"All right," he mumbles. "Let me hear it."

"What do you want me to say?" asks Sam. "That I'm pissed? Okay. I am. I'm pissed. You lied to me. Again."

"I didn't have a choice."

"I was ready to die, Dean!"

"You were what?" I stammer.

"Josette, maybe we should—" Castiel tries to pull me away.

"No, no. This concerns me."

"I know," says Dean, answering Sam. "But I wouldn't let you, because that's not in me."

"So, what?" asks Sam. "You decide to trick me into being possessed by some...psycho angel?"

"He saved your life."

"So what? I was willing to die. And now...Kevin..."

"No. That is not you. Kevin's blood is on my hands, and that ain't ever getting clean. I'll burn for that. I will. But I'll find Gadreel. And I will end that son of a bitch. But I'll do it alone."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I ask, a bit offended.

"You haven't been around enough, Jo, to get the memo. I'm...I'm poison. People get close to me, they get killed...or worse." The haunted look in his eyes tells me that the loss has been fairly recently, and possibly more than just Kevin. "You know, I tell myself that I-I—I help more people than I hurt. And I tell myself that I'm—I'm doing it all for the right reasons, and I—I believe that. But I can't—I won't...Drag anybody through the muck with me. Not anymore."

What's gone on since I left? What's so bad that Dean's made this assumption and label for himself? I'm at a loss for words. I truly am.

"Go," says Sam. "I'm not gonna stop you."

I run my hand through my hair and remain awkward in this situation as Dean turns to leave.

"But don't go thinking that's the problem," Sam tells him, "'cause it's not."

"What's that supposed to mean?" says Dean. He doesn't bother to turn around.

"Just go."

My mouth opens slightly, but nothing comes out. What is there to say in a situation like this? As Dean walks back to the Impala in the rain, I'm left confused beyond belief. I already know there's way more to this that I have no idea about. I feel like I should know the origin behind this, how their relationship got so...so...messy.

I mean, I knew the Winchester family dynamic was dysfunctional before I left, but now, it seems like it's gotten so much worse.

"What even happened?" I choke out. The Impala purrs to life, Dean kicks her into gear, disappearing off of the dock, leaving Castiel, Sam, and I in the rain.

"Hell and everything in between," Sam tells me quietly. "Hey, uh, do you mind driving us back to the bunker, Josette?"

"Hmm? Oh, yeah, sure. Whatever you need. Come on." I feel like wringing my hair out from the collection of water it's been doing.

I sit, not turning the keys in my truck just yet. My head hurts. A flashback of what I did comes to mind. This is different. I never said those words that Dean did. Our situations weren't the same.

"You okay, Jo?"

"Yeah." I turn the keys. "I think I am."

I back us out of the docks and start the drive back to the bunker, where we're all sure we won't find Dean. 

**If Jo thought her family was messed up before...

If only she knew.**