Don't judge.

Chapter 5

I went in the gym teacher office, I sat down. I see that he asigned them to a warm up as he headed to my direction.

When he got in he sat across from me, he then says in mono tone.

"Roxanne, are you feeling okay?"

I look up at him and I say "Yeah, it's just problems at home"

"Okay, and I see that your talking to Marcel.."

"Yeah?"

"Well, it's good I think, cause he's always been a good guy"

"okay?"

"well, okay...go do your warm up now"

I left and did my warm up.

when everyone was done with their warm ups the gym teacher says "free time, I know I been giving quiet alot of free time but this is only cause theres not much to do and school is ending in a month"

we all went off on our own. I went to sit at the bleachers. I popped my headphones on and leaned back and closed my eyes. I just really dont want to deal with anything.

I open my eyes to see that Niall sat next to me, I took my earphones out sat straight and I said "Oh hey Niall" he looks at me and asks "Are you okay?" I gave a half smile and I say "yeah, just family problems" "oh, hope things get better" "yeah, so you up for tonight?" "Haha, im irish so im totally up" "Haha you a heavy drinker?" "Hell yeah" "me too".

my phone rang out of nowhere. it was zayn.

"Zayn?"

"Roxanne, I need you"

I looked at Niall in worrisome

"Whats wrong? what happened?"

"Im doing it again, I just couldnt Roxanne... "

"where are you? "

"infront of your school...I didnt know where else to go"

"okay, I'll be out in five"

"Roxanne im sorry...."

"Zayn it's okay we can work this out"

"Thanks..."

I hung up, I looked up at Niall and I said quickly "Uhm, I need to go" "how do you plan on sneaking out?" "im just gunna walk out, can you tell the rest including Marcel to meet me up front after school" "yeah no problem" "thanks".

I ran to the locker room and wore my school clothes I wrote a fake note and forged my mums signature. I quickly gave it to the gym teacher he nodded and let me out.

I ran to the front to see Zayn in tears I ran to the car and quickly tossed my bag in the back.

"Zayn come here" I held him in my arms he was sobbing. he's been struggling with this for a while now.

he says in between sobs "Roxanne....im....so...rry..." I pat his back saying "Zayn, every thing will be fine".

Zayn has been struggling with being bulimic for a while, he started purging his food since middle school, I dont know exactly what started him but I think it was because of some kids in school who called him weak, fat, and he wasnt even fat before.

he's underweight by 15 pounds for god sake, I been helping him through this for such a long time. it scares me. the thing is im suffering almost the same as him, im only 5 pounds under weight now I can go days without eating and I have. im very small, I mean im only 5' 1" tall and I weigh 90 pounds. zayn is 5'10" and weight 115 pounds thats crazy low.

I say in stutter "Zayn, lets go to your house" he starts his car as we drove. both of us refuse to visit the doctor, cause we're afraid.

when we arrived we went in silents. Zayn says "Liam is upstairs practicing, he doesnt know any of this" "okay, now tell me...how much did you throw up?" "everything I ate....." "common what do you want to eat?" "uhmmm....nothing" "How about we turn on some netflix, and grab tubs of icecream and watch movies with darcy and eat like we use to?" "Yeah".

this was the only way we would gain weight, theres was no other way. I grabbed a tub of cookie dough and a tub of mint chocalte and two huge spoons as we turned on freedom writer, we've watch this movie a million times but its just such a great movie.

Darcy cuddled next to us as we both ate and watched switching tubs every now and then.

I smiled cause I got Zayn to eat, and he didnt try to purge the whole time. we watch several other movies. Liam did come down to get something to eat but soon went back up to work out again.

Zayn fell asleep in the middle of watching toy story, I took his empty tub as I layed a blanket over him. school doesnt end in another hour or so I let him rest.

I threw away the 4 tubs of ice cream we went through, I went upstairs to Liam.

I knocked at his door.

"come in!"

I walked in to see that he's all sweaty. I sat down as I say "So tell me the truth, how dangerous is this really" "uh....zayn told me not to say" "well, im telling you to tell me" "fine fine, it's very dangerous people 10X his strength will temp to fight him, considering he is underweight" "Wait you know that he's underweight" "its easy to notice, but zayn is a strong guy he can beat people 3X his size" "Liam, im scared for him" "I know, he'll be alright I promise""we both know you cant really promise that" "I'll do my best to keep him safe" I nodded.

I look up again and I say "Hey, can we go to the pint store for tonight? zayn is sleeping and I dont want to wake him" "yeah, lets go".

me and him headed, I brought 100$. when we arrived we bought a bottle of scotch and two bottles of vodka, when we Liam was showing his ID the casher gave me a look then at Liam as if she's saying I shouldnt be with a scary buff looking guy who practacally a foot taller then me. I gave out a giggle and nodded my head no.

when I got home Zayn was up and awake watching the telly. I smiled as I went over to him and leaned my head on his shoulder.

"you feel better?"

"I feel fat"

"your not"

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so I made this chappie long cause it's been a while since I updated.

guys I saw 1D it felt like a dream. and honestly I thoygh zayn was extremely skinny...there was a fan holding up a posters of Liam in a mankinny and his dick part lighting up. I couldnt stop laughing.

well thanks for the people who's still reading. I'll update once to twice a week okay(:. love you all!

A PHOTO OF ZAYN CRYING ON THE SIDE.