Waiting for love

Waitiing for love

"No one will ever want you." A spiteful voice tells me in my head.

"Your boring, quiet and a damn shame." it continues.

My heartbreaks as I continue to hear it as it tells me the words and tells me examples of how I'll never be the one for somebody.

I see all the beautiful girls in my school. Brunnetes and Blondes fill the room, with their flowing medium length hair and their acne free flawless creamed faces. Most are about five foot three and their all outgoing and joyful as can be.

"Oh, you look beautiful!" a voice echos from the room.

I turn to the right and see the popular brunnete girls in their group go on about one girl's hair.

"It's not even that goodlooking." I say to myself, eyeing the strawberry blonde girl with a limp bobcut hairstyle.

"Wow, your so pretty Jasmine, you have beautiful hair, pretty brown eyes, and the cutest laugh ever!" a friend of her says.

"Anybody would want to date you, actually you already have some offers from John, Carlos and Steve. Will you choose one?" The next girl adds.

Everyone in this classroom has had a boyfriend or girlfriend. The fat and the skinny, the nerdy and the populars, so what about me? What am I doing wrong?

I lay on my clear white school desk, praying for romance to come in my life. But I think, "What if he gets bored with me when we text?" All I can type is a small message. I'm not even good at conversations.

I dream for a boyfriend everyday, one that will love me for who I am and not for where I come from or my social status.

Every day, as I grow older, I say, "Please, I don't want to end up like the Old lady with 50 cats or Susan Boyle, who both, haven't recived their first kiss yet."

My mind starts to flashback on when four months ago, my Mother told me that I should be dating.

"You need to start talking to boys and getting their numbers." she stresses.

But little nervous me, is clueless on how to talk to boys and doesn't know how to get them coming for more.

I can see it now,

The boy who I crush on looks at me. I glance at him and smile, trying to cover my long tooth on the right thats on top of my gum.

"Hi." he says casually.

My mind would race with thoughts of our "future", kissing, and passionate love making.

"Hello." I say, trying to keep my voice steady.

"Your really, pretty." he says looking into my dark brown puppydog eyes.

I look into his slate eyes, smile, like any girl would if their crush talked to them and say,

"Uh. No I'm not." My voice goes down depressingly.

I started to envy every girl in my class. Their beauty, social life, everything.

The conversation would end, all because of me.

Sometimes, when I'm in the shops, like Ross, Target or even the wonderful Mall. I see cute teenage boys, with their athelitic bodies, black hair and breathtaking eyes. They glance at me, some turn their heads, I look at them, but my head is down.

"I'm in a fool's body." I tell myself.