After getting dumped by Claire, I went to the one person I know I can talk to... My best mate Tom.
I walked into his work office and set down a few groceries I had gotten and set them down on his counter. "Tom?"
He took a bite out of his Chopped Pork Sandwich and said with a mouthful, "Hey."
I suddenly had a funny thought come to my head. With a smirk on my face, I walked over to him casually and got close enough to where I was touching him with my body, than began playfully pelvic thrusting him and his sandwich. "Want to play Sexual Harassment?" I giggled and got closer as I was doing it and laughed a bit. "Okay, lets go." I knew he couldn't do anything with his sandwich in both his mouth and hands, so I kept going, making sounds that resembled a truck backing up and than going forward, repeatedly. "Oooh... Oooh... Yeah, yeah." I moaned playfully in between laughs as I kept going. After a few personally hilarious moments of this, Tom finally swallowed enough of his food to say something," Could you not? This isn't even sexual harassment, it's just annoying." He set down his sandwich and pushed my giggling self away from him. After composing myself from the whole ordeal, I walked over to his desk and sat down on it. "What're you doing?"
He pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose and said after taking another bite, "I'm on my break."
I nodded slightly and looked at his computer screen and a giggle erupted from my throat. "Are you Googling Giraffes again?" I said with fake shun in my voice.
Tom wiped his mouth with a napkin and looked at me like It was normal, "Yeah, and could you get off my Desk? Your jeans scratch it." I rolled my eyes and as I hopped down and got into another rolling chair, I said," Why're you always Googling Giraffes?" He sighed and said irritably, "I'm not always Googling Giraffes, just last time you came I was Googling Giraffes and it just so happened that I was also Googling Giraffes today."
I smiled slightly and said, "I'm just starting to think you have this special affinity with Giraffes-"
"I don't!" He shouted in annoyance as he loudly cut me off. I raised my eyebrows and cocked my head in a sort of 'Mkay, well I don't believe a word you're saying.' type way and said with certainty, "Well, I bring this up because I think it's because you sort of look like one, but less graceful."
Tom shook his head and took another bite of his sandwich, "Giraffes aren't graceful."
"Yeah, well, I think they're surprisingly graceful."
"No they're not. Have you ever seen one pick something off the floor?"
I smirked playfully and muttered like I was coming to realization, "I guess you would know with your.." I paused to hold back a laugh, "Special Research."
Tom sighed loudly, his anger coming through, and quickly changed the subject. "So, Claire said she broke up with you."
I shrugged and said admittedly," Yep... Yeah." I dragged the Yeah on for a few seconds in an awkward whisper, as I looked away from him. "Yep, yep, yep, yeah." I whispered faintly as I looked right back at him. "Also," I said suddenly at a normal vocal volume, "I cut myself shaving and you are obsessed with Giraffes, so, that's Three pieces of bad news in one day." I smirked at him playfully. He ran his hand through his hair and murmured, "I've decided that I am going to break up with Niamh."
I scrunched my eyebrows together and said knowingly, "Why do you do this to me, Tom? We both know you're not going to. I don't know why you lie to me. You get my little hopes up-"
