Of Choosing You

1 - Moving Forward

Chapter 1 - Moving Forward

"Her heart, fragile yet so pure,
Had been taken for granted.
It longs for love and cure,
T'was what she always wanted.

- R.V. Ross"

I take a deep breath and let it out slowly as soon as I step out of the plane. Binati ako agad ng mataas na araw at mainit na simoy ng hangin.

Sigh.

Of course. What can I expect from the Philippines ngayong summer season na? It feels like I need a fan to carry with me every time! Well, I definitely need an AC in my room.

I walk toward the airport and follow the direction of the people na kasabay ko papuntang baggage carousel. I can hear the clicks of the heels of those women walking, the ugly cries of the babies, the noise of those people talking and laughing and even those angry passengers with their voices raised at the attendants.

I don't get that. Can't everybody just calm down? Hindi ba nila naisip na kung nai-stress sila sa mga nawawalang bagahe ay mas na-i-istress ang mga agents dito lalo na kung ganyang sinisigawan nila? Wala rin namang matatapos kahit sigaw-sigawan nila nang sobra ang mga trabahador dito. Oh, people. Kaya walang asenso. Simpleng bagay, hindi intindihin. Can't they even just pause for a moment and truly understand the situation?

One agent catches my attention. Medyo malapit siya sa'kin kaya naririnig ko ang pagrereklamo ng mga hindi makaintinding pasahero sa kanya. They're mad 'cause their baggages seem lost. I feel sorry for her. Tatlo ang nagrereklamo sa kanya. Three against one? That's not fair. Isa pa, hindi siya pwedeng sumagot nang hindi nag-iisip. Now, how can she possibly explain the situation in a simple way kung sabay-sabay na nagsasalita ang mga kausap niya? One of them is even close to shouting. The agent is nervous. It's clear sa facial expression niya. Well, who wouldn't be? Parang mananakit 'yung isa do'n sa tatlo.

She takes a deep breath. Good, that's right. Let it out slowly.

"Ma'am. Kalma po. Gusto niyo po bang mahanap ang bagahe niyo? Ito na nga po at gagawan ko ng report para maprocess na. Kung ayaw niyo pong gawan ko dahil natatagalan kayo, you can look for it by yourself," sagot ng attendant.

My brows raise instantly as I smile. Well, finally, she gets the courage to speak up.

I continue my way to the carousel and leave her to her business. That could've been me right there. I could've been one of these agents. Minsan, I can't help thinking, what if I never left the country? What if I stayed and applied to one of these airlines to be a Customer Service Agent? What if I pursued my dream to be a Flight Attendant? What would my life be like? FA na kaya ako?

I laugh at the thought.

Hindi siguro. Being an FA is too much work. Too much preparation lalo na kung alam mong hindi ka na agad pasok sa physical requirements pa lang nila. You'll get ready tapos kahaharapin mo pa 'yung walang-katapusang rejection until mukha ka nang beauty queen.

No, don't get me wrong. I'm not hating on the job. It's just not for me, I think. I love the thought of being an FA. It's my dream, actually. I always saw myself as an FA nung college. But now, I grew tired of it. I'm not fit for the job. I get pimples every month, my weight and height aren't proportion, my skin isn't fair enough, and I have dark spots sa skin like normal people. I just can't find a job that pays well para magpaganda at ma-meet ang requirements ng isang FA. Kung gano'n ang gagawin ko, it feels like I'm wasting my time focusing on that certain career to the point na hindi ko na ma-enjoy ang current job ko.

That ain't happening.

I turn my phone on while I'm waiting for my suitcases. Keira should be here by now. I don't have my Philippine phone number anymore so I can't really text her. Wifi's really crappy here in the airport so I'm stuck if she shows up late. She told me she'd fetch me even though I insisted na 'wag na lang. Wala naman daw siyang ginagawa so pumayag na ako. Makulit din, e. Besides, I miss her. Kahit nakakapag-usap kami sa Skype, iba pa rin 'yung personal na.