The Lotus ✓︎

Five

My alarm clock went off, instantly waking me up. My hand shot out to grab my phone to turn it off. I hated the loud noise early in the morning. I opened my eyes and stared at my ceiling for a few seconds, attempting to get myself out of bed.

With a sigh, I got up and grabbed my things, walking into the bathroom as I turned my phone onto my favorite radio station.

As I brushed my teeth, I stared at my eyes, noticing how tired I looked. I sighed again as I realized I would need makeup to cover my sleepless eyes. Today was worse than other days and I realized I would have a long game if I didn't get a chance to get some rest. I hoped to sleep on the bus, even though it would be uncomfortable, for the most part. 

I stepped in the shower, letting the warm water relax my stiffened body. My body was sore from practice and the thrashing around I had done last night in my sleep. It was taking its toll on me, I realized. I would have to stretch for a few minutes to relax my body.

After my shower, I went through my usual routine and wrapped my hair in the towel as I got ready for the day. I packed both my school bag and my gym back and went downstairs for breakfast. I still had half an hour before I had to leave for school and another hour before school began. Just as I began to pour my food, my phone rang, making me pause.

I didn't look at the screen before I answered, too preoccupied with the food.

"Hello?" I answered.

"Baby sis!" my brother greeted me on the other end.

"Hi, Liam. What made you remember me on this fine morning?" I asked as I walked to the table with my breakfast.

I dug into my food as I listened to Liam on the other end.

"I always remember you, Heath. How can I forget my little sister?"

"Liam, quit sprouting bull. You barely ever call me anymore. Should I be worried about whatever it is that's keeping you even more occupied?" I teased. "Or, rather, whoever is keeping you from me?"

"Heather, I am appalled," he gasped, feigning shock. "Do you really think your sweet, innocent brother could do something atrocious?"

"Innocent, my ass," I snorted. "But I have to admit, I am glad to hear from you. How's everything there with you?"

"It's all good. Just busy with work and school. I'm actually enjoying myself here. I think you'd really like it up here, Heath. There are plenty of coffee shops around here that you'd enjoy. Of course, you'd have to travel a little because they're not too close to each other," he explained.

"Maybe I can come out there and visit over my winter break or something, then. I'm glad you're doing well, bro."

We talked as I finished breakfast and unwrapped my hair. I gently finger combed it and pinned it back, letting it air dry. My mom was up and eating breakfast when I was finally ready to leave. She finished her food as I slipped into a pair of boots.

I ended the call with my brother, him saying he had to get to class on time but that he'd call me later. I kissed the side of my mom's head in greeting and left to start the car as she went through her routine in the kitchen. We had fallen into a routine that was almost second nature to the two of us. As I sat in the car, I turned the radio onto my favorite station, knowing my mom would be amused within moments. I always made sure to catch a smile on her face before I left for school.

As she drove me to school, I sang in a rather horrible voice to her and smiled as she laughed at my ridiculousness. It was mornings like these that made all the crappy things in my life worth it. I knew my life wasn't terrible, but a constant stream of bad occurrences had taken their toll on me. 

"You're sure you'll be able to get a ride from your coach?" my mom asked again.

"Yeah. She won't mind," I assured her. 

I kissed my mom's cheek and got out of the car, stopping by my gym locker first. My gym bag was heavy and I felt no desire to lug it around with me all day.

As I walked towards the cafeteria after getting my things, I glanced down at my phone to read Liam's text. I smiled fondly as I read my brother's goofy message. He may have been an adult, but he still acted like a child a lot of the time. It was part of his charm and one of the many things I loved about him. He always tried to bounce back every time something bad was thrown his way. It was one of the things I admired about him.

Being so invested in my phone, I bumped into someone and would have fallen back from losing my balance had the other person not steadied me.

A hand snaked around my waist and pulled my body to theirs, warmth immediately spreading through my body. I looked up in surprise, not expecting a reaction like that. I suddenly wished the ground could have swallowed me whole. In that moment, anything was welcome.

"Hey, Heather. Nice bumping into you," Gabriel greeted me, splaying his hand out further on my lower back.

My legs were between his, leaving me no space to move unless he moved back and gave me space to move. I didn't get my hopes up. The gleam in his eyes told me I wasn't going anywhere unless he wanted me to.

"Hello, Gabriel. I'd appreciate it if you'd let go of me. My friends are waiting for me," I managed to speak in a polite tone.

His hazel eyes studied me curiously, a mischievous gleam passing through them. I swallowed almost nervously. My body still reacted to his, despite the fact I wanted nothing more than to put as much distance between us as I possibly could. I didn't trust myself around him and up until now, I had done a fairly decent job of avoiding him.

"Why are you so eager to leave? If I remember correctly, you used to want the complete opposite of that, beautiful," he murmured as he leaned into me.

I was trapped in his arms and in no position to move. His eyes dropped to my lips for a moment before meeting my eyes again. I knew his intentions and also knew that if he kissed me, I would kiss him back, consequences be damned.

"Things change," I mumbled, trying to get him to lean back.

"We'll see how much they've changed," he told me.

Before I could respond, Gabriel pulled me into his embrace and kissed my lips, heat spreading in all the places his body made contact with mine.

I gasped in surprise and he took that moment to invade my mouth. I dropped my books and tried to push him away, but he was too strong for me. Stupid football player. 

My resistance didn't last very long, however. I suddenly found myself kissing him back, ignoring the fact that we were at school, ignoring the fact that he had broken my heart,  that he was part of the reason I had fallen apart so badly. 

I tangled my hands in his dark hair and pulled him closer to me, reveling in the warmth of his body, enjoying his hands on my waist that squeezed me tightly as he made a groaning sound in the back of his throat. And damn, was that a turn on.

We pulled away for air, and when he pressed our foreheads together and smirked, I realized what I had done.

I abruptly pushed him away from me and knelt down to gather my books. Once I had them, I stood up and began to walk away. He called me back and I stopped in my tracks, hating my actions.

"You can't walk away after what just happened, Heather," Gabriel called after me.

I turned around and managed to say in the most bitter tone I could muster, "I can and I will. It meant nothing, Gabriel. It was a mistake."

With that, I left to meet my friends knowing that if I turned around, I would go right back into his arms stay there. He was my bad habit- my addiction. But the worst part was my thoughts.

I didn't regret kissing Gabriel and given another chance, I would do it again.

I needed some serious help, I thought to myself.