what it was | √

ninth; out of my league by stephen speaks

He had another game that day.

I was there an hour before the game started because I wanted a peaceful spot when I read the school newspaper. I made sure there were no other errors in the printing, and as I was halfway through reading the content, without finding any errors at all, I set aside the paper and folded it, stuffing it inside my backpack.

The cheerleaders were stretching at the side of the benches, and a few kids were already positioned on the bench near the field. I, on the other hand, was enjoying my view which was watching the soccer players prep for the game. I spotted Luigi not too soon, already dressed and breathing heavily from their two minute jog.
I was about to leave and meet up with Mary and Rose at the front of the school when I saw a girl from the side of the field hand a bottle of water to Luigi, at the same time passing him a towel.

I narrowed my eyes to see who it was, but I couldn't see well. All I knew was that she wore a skirt and her long hair was tied up into a ponytail. She was familiar to my eyes, but with her distance away from me, I couldn't make out who it was.
Biting my lip, I sighed heavily and slammed my backpack on my shoulder, walking away from the benches and to Mary.

"Did he receive it?" I whispered to her as soon as we sat down on the bench. It was halfway crowded now, a little louder with the music from the speakers playing.

Mary raised two thumbs up at me. "Uh-huh. The waiter told me he had already received it last night after the party."

I bit my lip and nodded at her, focusing on the game.
But I couldn't really focus on it at all, even if Luigi's team had won by landslide.

"You're worried he didn't get it, do you?" Mary asked me as we all started to file out of the field.

I didn't know what to say. Maybe I was worried, but deep down I knew I was in a train of mixed emotions. I was partly jealous of the girl who cared for him earlier. Who knows? She was probably a cheerleader! Or a supermodel?

"Congratulations, Luigi!" Mary shouted at him as we passed by their team who were resting. He stood up along with his teammates as they proceeded to return to the shower room.

Luigi waved at her and I, grinning wide. "Thank you!"

"I saw you carry a gift last night! Was it a birthday gift?" Mary asked slowly. I stepped on her foot.

Luigi, for a heartbeat's moment, looked at me and smiled genuinely, his eyes sparkling wide like crystals.

"No... It was a gift, I think. Another, uh, CD." He looked at the ground.
His teammate started to call him, and before he turned away to run, he winked at us and said:
"It was from an anonymous sender, but I think I know who's it from."

I quickly turned and leaned on a bench, breathing heavily and staring at Mary with doe eyes, sweat dripping from my forehead.

He knows. Oh my gosh. He knows. He actually knows.

"He does not know!" Mary screamed at me, shaking me by the shoulders.

"Don't be obnoxious, Vanessa. We left no clues, all right? We have a clean track."

"But-" I stopped myself from speaking, closing my eyes and wiping my face with my shirt. "Shit. He can't find out now, not-"

"Then what're you going to do, Vanessa? Graduate without ever admitting to him that you're the one giving away the CD's? Leave all of this away and give up? Waste all your efforts and receive silence?"

I gulped several times, frowning.
"I don't know, okay? Because what if- what if he knows and he doesn't- he doesn't feel the same way? What if he just throws away all that i've done?" I breathed out, my chest heaving up and down as I looked at her with scornful eyes. I probably looked miserable.

"Yes, that's why! Those are the reasons why you should continue this whatever you're doing."

I pursed my lips and opened my eyes, finding the sun burning half of my face.
"Let's just go," I muttered, walking ahead.

As soon as I reached the school gate, with Mary and I preparing to walk home, I checked my bag for my ID which contained the keys to my house, but it wasn't there.

"Wait!" I yelled at Mary as I sprinted back to the benches, hoping my ID would be there.

I spotted it under the second bench, and when I bent to pick it up, I noticed something at the corner of my eye. After making sure I put my ID inside safely into my backpack, I cautiously walked to where Luigi and his team prepped up earlier.

And there I saw the towel handed to him earlier by the girl.

He must have dropped it.

And when I got my hands on it, I spread the white cotton towel in my hand and saw a name embroidered on it in a pink, cursive font.

Kate.

⚓️

I didn't know what love was. But slowly, I learned. And I learned that love is sinking deep into an ocean and trying to catch your breath without knowing how to swim.