Bleeding Hearts

Best Friends.

She calls me after 2 months.

It's not her fault. High School is hard. Really, really hard. We've both been busy. I've tried to be busy.

I start to cry when I'm not.

There's a few seconds of silence. I wonder if she still remembers my voice.

I don't remember hers.

Or at least I try not to. Remembering makes me cry.

"Hi," She says. I bite my lip.

"Hi," I reply. My voice is too high and too thin.

She erupts. I know she's had a marvellous day. Maybe her new best friend isn't at school today(I wonder if she's made any at all), or maybe she just wants to talk to me.

Maybe she misses me as much as I miss her.

She tells me she met a celebrity. His name doesn't register in my brain, it's a muddled up mess. She tells me she did a project. She tells me dressed up as Hermoine Granger. She tells me she started listening to Troye Sivan. She tells me she's been doing speeches( I'm shocked. She never did them before). She tells me she won second place.

She tells me about her new friend.

She tells me she looks like me.

"Oh," is all I can say. I am trying not to cry. I am failing.

She tells me she misses me.

I tell her I'll call her back. I'm losing her, I say.

She doesn't know how literal that is.

I end the call.

And then I drown in an ocean of pain and tears and memories and regrets and the sound of her voice.

I won't be able to sleep for weeks.