Love Is A Crazy Thing

thIrTy TWo

Braxton sleeps quietly in my arms. When he first opened his eyes yesterday and showed the world the purple eyes his mama gave him I cried. I cried so hard Christian had to take Brax from me. Little puffs of blonde hair and purple eyes.

"Baby, sleep. Let me take him for a while." I hold Braxton to my chest.

"But I just got him," I whine. Liam plays on the floor beside the bed, completely in his own world. "Let me hold the baby I carried for nine months."

My husband sighs deeply. "You picked him up five hours ago and won't put him down. I think you need sleep." As if he planned it, a yawn is ripped from my throat. My eyes droop but I manage to glare at the man.

"He needs me." With a look of finality the child is gently pries from my grip and put into the bassinet. Christian pushes me down into a lying position. "What--?"

"Liam needs a nap, Braxton needs a nap, I need a nap, you need a nap." Liam is put into his crib and Christian comes back with a soft smile. "Please let me hold you while you sleep. You've done enough for the day. Let me handle them."

"B-but Braxton needs to bond with me so he can sense me as his mother over the girls when he meets them."

"You didn't do that with Liam, and he knows you just fine." I stutter over what to say, and before I can formulate a sarcastic comment I'm fast asleep.

➖✖➖

Liam's head rests on my shoulder while I rock the whiny baby. "Ma-ma-ma, ti-ti." I sigh at his expression of being tired. He's had a warm bottle, some apple sauce, a bath, extra play time, but he cannot fall asleep. His cries pierce my ears and make me want to cry myself. I grab his toy and he sucks on it.

It's almost like someone turned the light on in my head. "Oh, my poor baby, teething hurts so bad." Together we head to the freezer and I retrieve the toys from earlier when he was getting his fronts. He greedily bites down on them, after another few minutes is passed out in my arms.

Once he's in bed and his door is left ajar I leave to the entertainment room. Everyone is gathered here to finally meet Braxton. We decided it would be best for us, Christian and I, that we waited for Liam to get slightly used to having another baby around and we get accustomed to waking up at one AM again before bringing others into the mix.

Dad is the first to hold Braxton. Christian pulls me into his arms, swaying us to the sound of the music.

Saviour will be there
When you are feeling alone, oh
A saviour for all that you do
So you live freely without their harm

So here I write my lullaby
To all the lonely ones
Remember as you learn to try
To be the one you love
So I can take this pen
And teach you how to live
What is left unsaid
The greatest gift I give

So hear my voice remind you not to bleed

My head rests on my husband's chest and I can't help but think; love is a crazy thing.

Started: Sunday, November 8th, 2015. (Two days before my birthday hehe)
Finished: Friday, March 4th, 2016