Babydoll Sampler//Luke Hemmings #Wattys2016

f i v e

I am walking through this crowded streets filled with angelic people but the only one that I want is daddy.

I looked at the sky when a droplet of rain caressed my skin.

I guess the God's above the sky feel the same way. The feeling of  loneliness and betrayal.

I know that I shouldn't have lead myself on because I already know my position in Luke's life.

Just a pleasure tutor. I'll just teach them how to pleasure each other then I'm gone. Just like a thin air undergone a chemical reaction and has no longer the same function or worth.

I will be worthless after our sessions.

Just like what I'm feeling right now.

I remember the things that happened after our first session as I try to hold back that tears that are threatening to spill.

"You can go home now slut!"Maurice said after we had our threesome.

"Yeah,you're worthless. You didn't gave us enough pleasure. Here, take this $100 slut." That's what broke me the most. When Luke said that I'm worthless.

I caressed my cheeks as I try to remove the brimming tears coming from my eyes and went to the nearest coffee shop to warm up my cold heart.

I don't know if after what happened, my feelings will still be the same for Luke. I know that I said to myself that I won't give up until I have him for my own.

But then, I realized that I'm wanting someone that is not mine and will never be mine.

But I don't know anymore if my life will still be the same without my daily dosage of watching him afar and masturbating because of him because my love for him is like a cycle. It will never end.

I pushed the coffee shop door and sat down near the window so I can feel the essence of having a rain.

You know sometimes I think to myself, what will I do if the day of apocalypse came true?

Will I go to Luke and tell him that I love him?

Or, will I find my own Prince charming that really cares for me and will love me for who I am not for what I've got.

I guess the second option is the best one to choose.

Luke, he is just a millionaire that can get any girl he wants, and I know to myself that I'm not what he wants.

I laughed to myself when I thought if I will kill Luke if he is the first one that will become a zombie.

I threw my head up when i heard the coffee shop bell door rung.

I want the mountains to swallow me now. Why can't he stay out of my sight for just an hour?

Luke and Maurice are here with Calum, Ashton and Michael.

I know those guys because I can see them when they are over Luke's house.

I try to cover myself as I made my way to the restrooms.

My hand shook as I opened the restrooms and locked it.

I looked at my reflection in the mirror and closed my eyes.

God, please help me to make the right choice. Should I stay away or should I fight for him even though he doesn't want me?

Someone knocked on the door and I went to open it because I don't own this restroom.

When I opened it, I came face to face with a smirking Maurice

"Thought we won't see you? Well, your wrong. And I heard some incredible and pitiful news."

"I don't care."

"Oh, you don't care that I already know the real reason why you became our babydoll sampler? Sorry Xandrea, but Luke said that he doesn't feel the same way." She mocked me.

I walked out of the restroom as tears started to spill my eyes. Again.

I was running and running until I bumped into someone.

"I don't want to see you crying." He said and hugged me.

Sorry for this filler but I was having a writer's block and I'm very busy this week