1.) Claim greasy hair is flammable.
2.) Light a flamethrower right above his head to prove it.
3.) Play Darth Vader's theme music (The Imperial March) whenever he is in sight.
4.) Spike his pumpkin juice with love potion.
5.) Use Polyjuice Potion to turn into Lily. Slap him and say that you liked James better.
6.) If you're feeling really evil, tell him you liked Dumbledore better than either of them.
7.) Set his robes on fire and say, "Not again!" Laugh.
8.) Dye all of his robes pink.
9.)Send him shampoo for Christmas, with a note attached that reads, "Take the hint."
10.) Also send him red and gold socks.
11.) Replace his pain relieving potions for the Cruciatus Curse with urine.
12.) Use computer editing to make incriminating photos of him.
13.) Invite him to Sirius Black's birthday party.
14.) Charm his hair into dread locks.
15.) In his private chambers, replace all of the Slytherin insignias and colors with those of Gryffindor.
16.) Tamper with Dumbledore's candy to give the consumer diarrhea. Give it to him and say it's from Lucius Malfoy.
17.)Tell Colin Creevey that Snape offered to pose nude for him.
18.) Cover his classroom with flowers and pink teddy bears. Leave a note that says Best of wishes, Snivellus. From the Marauders
19.) Shove Fillibuster fireworks into his loo.
20.) Create the first Severus Snape Barbie doll. Sell them to everyone at Hogwarts.
21.) Draw a lightning bolt scar on his forehead.
22.) Legally change his name to "Princess Cuddles McFluffigan."
23.) Shove him into the wall, screaming, "BOTHER! BOTHER!"
24.) Tie him to a chair and make him watch Barney.
25.) Weeks later, sing the "I Love You" song nonstop.
26.) If he is attacked by Dementors, replace his chocolate with laxatives.
27.) Put the Sorting Hat in his room. Make it sing the soundtrack from High School Musical.
28.) Compare his life to Darth Vader's.
29.) Set him up on a blind date with Umbridge...or Bellatrix...or Voldemort.
30.) Unleash hundreds of Pygmy Puffs on him. Make sure they are out for his blood.
31.) Give him a copy of Twilight. If he refuses to read it, read it to him yourself while he is tied to a chair.
32.) Say that he is a distant relative of the Cullens.
33.) If he attempts to hex you after this, run away, screaming, "HE WANTS MY BLOOD!"
34.) Tell Rita Skeeter that Snape is a vampire. Have it published in the Daily Prophet.
35.) Ask Moaning Myrtle to stalk him.
36.) "Snape, Snape, Severus Snape…" Repeat it. Over and over and over again…
37.) Use Polyjuice to look like Ron Weasley. Hand him a pregnancy test and say to him, "I think you might need this."
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100 ways to get kicked out of Hogwarts~
Fanfic100 ways to get kicked out of Hogwarts ;)
