Friend Zoning, Kim Hanbin

Chapter 13

a/n: prepare If - Taeyeon. It's like an OST or BGM or whatever you called it.

**

Two sentence. 6 word.

Difficult to thinks. Even harder to spit out.

"Let just be friends. Should we?"

I couldn't read his expression. I just felt his firm grip with my hands loosen.

His nervous yet smiled turn into a small fake one.

And it hit me. I just hurt him.

Guilt was all over me. If I could take back my word, I would. But I knew, it would be the better this way. For the both of us.

Just like Jiyoung Oppa, said. If it turn out to be a hassle. It's will distract him a lot.

I like him. No. I Love him. But I just can't bring myself to say that. I just can't.

What if his dream, his career ruined because of me?

And more importantly, what if we fall out of love?

I'm afraid. I'm scared. I'm too scared that I would lose him one day. If being friends would keep thing as smooth as now. I wouldn't want to ruined it.

I just want to hug him and say sorry but I don't want him to feel worser than he already is.

"It's o-okay, I understand," He says. His eyes are beam with tears that are threatening to fall out.

I just made him cried. Again. I just did.

And at that moment, I just wanna run away. I wanna hide. If I didn't come to his picture, he wouldn't be this hurt right?

It's an rare sight, seeing him like this. I'm used to see the happy and cheery him that it's broke me to see him now.

I hate myself. I just did this to him. Why did I tutored ourselves like this?

"Let go back, s-shall we?" He mumble, hiding his soft sobs but it still loud enough for me to hear.

I just nodded upon his suggestion because my mouth dosen't seem like it can makes any word right now.

(a/n: Play; If - Taeyeon)

We head out of the store with Hanbin walking slightly ahead of me. I just let him be.

I don't want to say anything just yet or more like I don't know what to say yet. I'm afraid that I will just end up hurting him more if I say anything else.

I watch him walk infront of me. His head is bobbed down, his shoulder sagged and his feet kicked on whatever he see on the ground.

He seem lost. He seem broken.

And it's all because of me.

♪ If I were to go, If I were to get close to you ♪

I want to get close to you. I want to cross the 'friends' line.

♪ what do you think? I don't have the courage ♪

I'm dying to tell you what I actually felt inside. My real feelings.

But I don't have the courage. The will to do so.

♪ if you were to go, if you were to leave. How could I sent you away? That keep scaring me ♪

I want to you to leave me. To find someone better.

But just the thought of you, actually liking someone else kill me to the core.