Heart and Desire (boyxboy)

Chapter Twenty

Ash's POV:

"Oli?" I spoke timidly, fearful of his presence for the first time. It was the first time I'd been anything less than confident in front of anyone other than Garrett. Honestly, I had no idea why I had confronted Oli.

Lopping his head lazily to the side, Oli gazed up at me with a bored expression, a look he'd never directed at me before. My former boyfriend's indifference made me frown but the sparkle in his eyes told me that, on the inside, he was fighting a battle between his heart and mind. At least, I hoped that was the case. It meant he still felt something for me.

A brown-haired kid sat beside Oli, his expression one of anger and blatant loathing. He had shuffled round to face me, his head cocked slightly to the side like a confused puppy, his gentle demeanour clashing with the vortex of asperity he had shrouded himself in. Guiltily, I suppressed a smirk; he was a cute kid with elegant, childlike features but his violent cerulean eyes and furrowed eyebrows warned me away from a false sense of security. As I shifted my weight awkwardly from one foot to the other, Oli's friend shot to his feet, clenching his fists and growling menacingly. His innocent baby-face made it difficult for me to believe the threat he intended. Oli reached up to brush his fingers against the kid's hand. Eventually, he unclenched his fists and let out a low, trembling breath.

"It's okay, Silas." Oli spoke strongly but remained calm, rising to stand beside his friend, who gazed up at Oli with his huge doe eyes. Something about the boy - Silas - unleashed a silent rage within me. My blood boiled at his protectiveness and, well, friendship. Oli smiled for Silas - a genuine, pacifying smile - but his expression turned neutral when his eyes fell upon me. An exquisite pain rampaged through my body when we made eye contact. All I saw in his eyes was his hurt, shame and disappointment.

"What do you want, Ash?" Oli hissed, keeping his voice level. I envied his composure. I, on the other hand, was waging a war against my emotions.

Oli's velvety voice brought on a bout of memories which flooded behind my eyelids, forcibly reminding me that I could never again share a smile, a laugh, a sweet kiss with him. It tore at my heart, shredding the organ beyond recognition. I began to regret approaching Oli.

"I... Oli, I just wanted to say..." I tried, but failed miserably, to explain what I was trying to achieve. Because, really, I had no idea. What did I expect would happen? I couldn't explain this to Oli now, just like I couldn't explain it to him last time, when my mum had forced me to call him.

Silas was still giving me a death glare, which I received with calm acceptance, almost certain he knew what I had done to Oli. They appear to be close, which I envied.

Belatedly, I realized Oli was staring at something - or, more accurately, someone - behind me, hatred contorting his face, "What is he doing here?" Oli growled, balling his fists tightly, a storm brewing in his steely voice. Silas moved protectively in front of Oli, a brave gesture that boiled my blood for reasons I couldn't explain.

"Shit." I mumbled, knowing that, by turning around, I would confirm my worst fears.

Risking a glance over my shoulder, I saw Garrett sauntering across the field towards us, seemingly ignoring my request for him to stay in the park. Turning my eyes back to Oli, I muttered lamely, "I'm sorry for coming over here. It's just... I think I needed some closure." I spoke sadly, to which Oli scoffed loudly. Even I knew it was a poor excuse, but it was the only excuse I could think of and I needed to talk to him. If only to say goodbye. Besides, truthfully, closure wasn't such a bad idea.

"Yeah, well, that fits in quite nicely to what I've been meaning to tell you." Oli muttered cynically, rolling his eyes. Before he could continue, Garrett appeared at my side, circling his arms around my waist. His chin rested on my shoulder and he planted a kiss on my cheek, a gesture as deliberate as it was unwelcome.