FORBIDDEN

CHAPTER 10. TOM

She lied there by the fire, looking peaceful as if in death, her usually golden skin was a pale distressing color, her pale pink lips were now a shade of violet-blue.

She hadn't woken up for three days now, well four if you count it's almost mid night now. "Come on Valerie, wake up", my voice cracked a bit and I bit my lips to keep the tears from flowing out. A man doesn't cry especially in this predicament.

I blame myself for what happened, I was never angry at Valerie for laughing at her friend it was understandable even I wanted to laugh, no, I blamed her for leaving me, for not being there for me when I needed a friend. But I knew I couldn't show my anger because of that, I would just be weak, so I pretended to be mad at her because of the accident. If I had been there, by her side she wouldn't have fallen in I'm sure.

I shake my head as if shaking the thoughts away but instead it just makes the tears start to fall. I clench my hands into fists hard, not caring if my nails were digging into my palms or the feel of blood in them, I covered my face with my fist and cried silently, my shoulders shaking violently. That's when I felt a warm arms wrap themselves  around me. At first I thought it was Valerie but last I touched her she was freezing and she wasn't so skinny.

I looked up to see Luisa, concern written all over her face. I gently placed my head on her shoulder afraid I would break them. I didn't deserve this comfort it was my fault, my fault Valerie was laying on a bed by the fire as she sinks into death each passing second. "I don't deserve to be comforted", i told her moving my head from her shoulders.

"Hush now child. Who told you that. Where you the one who broke the ice and made her fall in?"

I shook my head, "but I wasn't there for her".

"Now dear, you can't be there for her everywhere, somethings will happen that you can't control"

"I know but I was mad at her Luisa. If she dies that will be the last time she saw me".

Luisa smacked me on the arm making me jump in surprise and look at her shocked.
"Do not say such vulgar things Tom. If I was Valerie I would want my friend to believe I can still live. Valerie is a very stubborn girl, don't think she'll let death win that easily".

I couldn't help but smile at that, "she is, isn't she". My smile disappeared and I sighed, " If she wakes up I don't care if she wants to stay away from me, I just want her to wake up".

A look of sympathy crossed Luisa's face but I ignored it.
"Did you know I've told her more than ten times it was a bad idea to be around you. Of course she never listened, I was quite surprised when she did. Trust me if it takes her that long to stop talking to you it means she never wanted to stop in the first place".

"Then why did you make her?" It came out more like a growl than a question.

"You love her right?"

I nodded, "I mean like a friend I guess".

Luisa just rolled her eyes and continued. "Then you should understand the dangers your putting her in by being by her side. Slaves aren't the same as their masters so we do not converse. If she was found she could have gotten a deadly beating or even worse".

My gaze was cast on the ground. I never thought of that, that Valerie was risking her life just being near me. I went back to my fist over my face position, "Why does it have to be this way?" I asked frustrated.

"Its not this way in the north" she mumbled her voice barely audible.

"What?" I asked.

"Its nothing never mind"