You Can't Stop Love

Going in or coming out?

Louis's POV:

Harry. Harry. Harry. Freaking. Styles. I hate him. Him and his eyes. Him and his hair. Him and his lips, the ones that are occasionally on mine, and then telling me that we can't do this. Doesn't he think I know that? I know we can't be together because of Modest!, but Union J dropped Modest! so one of them could come out. I'm not gay though.... am I?

I've actually never thought about it before. I could talk to another one of the boys about it- wait. That's stupid. Harry has a girlfriend. A girlfriend whom he cheats on every time he sees me. Of course, it's not intentional. He doesn't kiss me hello or goodbye- well, I guess you could say he was saying goodbye. We'll talk for a while, kiss, and then he'll freak out and leave.

A goodbye kiss. A hello kiss. Harry. His eyes.

No!

I'm so cliché. In a fight with myself about liking someone.

Today in the hospital, we almost held hands. It made me feel so happy. Now that I've rid myself of Eleanor, I could do this. I could come out, right? Not as Harry's boyfriend, because I don't think that's what I am, plus he has a girlfriend. But, I could come out. Modest! would freak, but we could drop them, too. Right? They're just a nuisance anyways.

I go back to the last time Harry and I kissed. It seemed so natural, as if we were together. We kissed for what seemed like hours, sitting on the couch in El and my- or just my, I guess- house. Then, he pulled away and freaked out. He said, "I have a girlfriend. We're going on a date in a couple of hours." It hurt. He basically threw it in my face; almost as an insult. It hurt bad.

I am gay, aren't I? I'm gay, and I like Harry. I feel better coming to terms with who I am. A lot better.