Excitement is rushing through my body as I get ready, well not really, its not like I was going anywhere special. I slip on a baggy jumper and black leggings, finishing off with a coat of mascara. its around 10:30 pm and me, drew and Steve decided to meet up to hang out a little up at "the chair". (its on a hill, in a reserve, next to my house)
I once again out of habit assess my body and face pointing out my flaws. I start thinking about how good Damian made me feel, showering me with compliments and such sweet words. I shake my head dismissing the memory. He's only my friend now, and that's the way I chose it to be. its only been a couple days and I of course cant get Damian off my mind. I thought after we had separated wed stop talking all together. but no. Damian kept his word and I still woke up at 1am to talk to him, I couldn't erase him from my life. he was truly my best friend.
My phone starts to vibrate constantly. I unlock it and its still vibrating "fucking asshole", I murmur as I read a bunch of random letters, its drew and he's spamming me. I sigh and text "a simple "I'm here" would have done just fine idiot". this was our relationship, insulting each other for fun. drew was a weird dude.
I begin to make my way up to the chair seeing their silhouettes against the city lights in the distance. "sup guys" I greet the both of them. we start to mess around giving piggy back rides and stuff, and I cant help but feel as if Steve has all his attention on me. He's always really close to me and I catch him glancing at me sometimes. I absolutely love the attention but cant help but feel guilty and wrong. Damian hasn't left my mind and I doubt he wont be anytime soon. But this is what I wanted. The physical aspects of a relationship and that couldn't happen between me and him. I need to let him go. And I intend to do that tonight.
Its been around an four of me, drew and Steve messing around when we decide to call it a night, I was beginning to get sleepy, not to mention spending a lot of time with drew and his personality, it can be a damn handful.
"ill walk you guys halfway" I say to them, that was the usual. Whoever's house we were at we always walked the other halfway.
2 minutes later of walking I feel Steve slip his hand into mine and he stops me, we are at a huge pine tree by now, with drew still walking not noticing Steve and I had stopped , Steve pulls me toward him under the tree. my hearts starts racing, I did NOT expect this. Steve rests one of his palms on my cheek and the other hand on the small of my back. he begins to move his face towards mine. I freeze. what the hell is he doing I think, Damian suddenly comes to mind and I mentally tell myself off for thinking about him. why am I thinking of him when this cute guy is about to kiss me. my last thoughts before Steve's lips met mine were "fuck it, this is what I wanted". after 20 seconds of "kissing", I say that cuz Steve was HORRIBLE at it, I mean it was my first kiss yes but I knew kissing wasn't supposed to suck that bad, Steve pulls back and smiles at me. my mind is whirling with thoughts and of course Damian. so I do the only thing I can think of. run. one thought stood out to me, clear as crystal, in my head as I ran my white ass home. it should have been Damian.
a/n short chapter today haha I had no joy writing this chapter, too many stupid mistakes I made, whatever this is for my boy I hope your feeling a lot better<3, don't mind the incorrect grammar. xxx
