Roses and Sonatas [Harvest Moon: Tale of Two Towns]

Chapter 8

I woke slowly, the sound of birdsong outside my window chasing the last remnants of vaguely dark and desperate dreams from the deepest recesses of my mind. I sat up, feeling disoriented and shaky, and looked around. Then I saw Mikhail in a chair next to the bed, watching me with a slightly puzzled look . "What... what happened?" I asked, rubbing my forehead, trying to remember.

He reached out a hand to my shoulder and gently pushed me back down. "Take it easy, Alice. You fainted. You should lie down and rest for a bit." He rose and began to pace the room. "I apologize for surprising you in that manner. It was not my intent to spy on you, nor to startle you. I was just about to leave as you had asked, when I decided that I... I simply couldn't. I needed to hear from you why... why you walked away all those years ago. I lied to you, when I said I haven't thought of you in years. The truth, Alice, is that I think of you every day, nearly constantly. At times... I admit that I've hated you. Yet even then, I couldn't stop loving you. I love you still... whether I want to or not. But I've never understood why... why you were so cold to me in the end. And so, instead of leaving, I closed the door again and turned around... but before I could confront you, you collapsed in tears. It was clear you didn't know I was still there, so I watched and waited, torn between leaving and staying. I admit I was taken by surprise. It wasn't what I expected from you, although I'm not sure just what I did expect."

He turned and looked at me pensively, and I sat up again, staring at him with unshed tears in my eyes and my throat throbbing with suppressed emotion. I hugged my legs and leaned my forehead against my knees, letting my hair fall around my face, hiding me from sight like a veil. "All right, Mikhail. I'll tell you everything. But... I don't know if you will believe me. And I don't think you'll enjoy hearing it. But I promise you, I will tell you the truth." I heard him sit again in the chair by my bed, though he didn't say a word as he waited for me to continue.

"To go back to the very beginning, when I was young, my parents wanted my brother and me to take music lessons. They felt that it was important that we learn to appreciate music, and what better way than to learn to play an instrument? After some thought, I chose the violin, so they set about finding an instructor for me. It was around that time that Master Emil arrived in our small town and began to accept students, and my parents sent me to him for lessons. I remember arriving at his home that first time, feeling nervous and not knowing what to expect. I was twelve at the time—as you might remember. When I arrived, he welcomed me into his home very kindly. He quickly put me at ease with his charming demeanor, and after determining that I knew nothing at all of music, he began to instruct me on how to use my instrument properly. He didn't seem at all put off by my complete and utter ignorance.

"Partway through my first lesson, as I was attempting to hold the instrument and bow correctly, I looked up and saw a thin, pale, beautiful boy standing in the doorway, staring with disdain at my clumsiness. I saw that he held a violin in his hands, but then he turned and slipped away without so much as a word. I asked Master Emil who he was, and he said that he was his ward—a talented boy named Mikhail. You. We continued my lesson, but my concentration was broken. I couldn't get that scornful look you gave me out of my mind. Suddenly I felt a burning desire to earn your approval, to turn that look of disdain into one of admiration. So I threw myself into my lessons, and I worked hard to improve as quickly as possible. My parents were astounded to see the effort I put into my daily practice, as well as how rapidly I improved. Master Emil likewise seemed pleased by my progress. But you... you still hardly even so much as glanced at me. So I kept working, determined to earn your admiration.

"I remember it was a beautiful summer evening when everything changed. Do you remember that night as clearly as I do? I'd been taking lessons from Master Emil for close to a year, and he had decided that I was ready to give my first student recital. I remember how terrified I was, but standing there waiting to go on stage, shaking like a leaf in the wind, I looked out into the audience and saw you. You looked so patronizing, like you were sure I would fail and you couldn't wait for me to make a fool of myself and have done with it. Well, that steeled me like nothing else could, let me tell you. I glided out there like a seasoned virtuoso, and I played as I'd never played before. I heard the thunderous applause when I was done, but I refused to look at you... because I couldn't bear it if I saw the same condescension in your eyes.