My Monster

bad memories

He pushed my hair to the side so he can have more access to the skin, he hid his head in the crook of my neck placing sweet kisses over the spot, my heart jumped up and down with every contact...I tried to scream out my lungs but nothing came from my dry throat...I stayed lost in confusion...maybe I had fallen asleep and this is just a dream...yes, it must be my imagination....my trembling hand rose in a weak attempt to strike his hair...I needed to check if this was real.....his hair was smooth, soft...

It felt real....Kris' fingers reached my cheeks before slowly sliding down to my neck, he clingers tighter to me as he felt my hands playing on his hair...I finally closed my eyes feeling effortless, I gave up enjoying the magic of the moment while my heart was violently hammering against my chest ...it was as if I was melting between his giant hands

"Katy! I brought you some cookies, open up the door honey!"

Great timing mom!

the door knocking brought both of us to reality so we swiftly moved apart feeling the awkwardness of the moment...Kris coughed embarrassingly as I hurried perplexed to the door to be met by my mom's usual bright smile

"I thought you worked really hard so I'm giving you a reward" she stated staring proudly at what she made

I nodded dumbly, my cheeks already fired up...I was looking anywhere in the room but her...if she catch me I am literally dead...and before leaving she waved at Kris smiling cheekily...oh mom! As if everything isn't messed up already

I closed the door behind as I tried to get a clearer idea of what should be my next step...should I act like nothing happened or what! I turned around to catch Kris' eyes staring at a picture stuck on the wall

"Who is this?" he asked pointing at the man in the photo who was sitting next to me

"My dad" I immediately answered smiling

"I haven't seen him around, well even in the school's parents meeting you always bring your mother "

He stated with a raised brow

"He's not here" I simply answered biting my lip

Kris's confused eyes met mine and I understood what he was thinking

" no it's not what you think, he just works in another country, he barely comes here but we talk with him almost every day" I said shaking my head only to see his reassured features"

"Oh" he murmured

"what about you? your dad also never showed up in any meeting" I asked just to keep this conversation going not really paying attention to his answer but what surprised me was the dead silence that filled the room after that question, I looked over to see a lost Kris...it was as if he feared this question . I got the impression there was something to that But I wasn't really sure if I wanted to know.

"I don't have one" he said harshly

I looked at him in full surprise not really knowing what does "I don't have one" exactly mean

Kris made few steps before putting his hands over my shoulders he looked at me intensely like he was scared that I would run away any moment

"I know you need an explanation Katy, for everything, and I'm ready to give you that now "

I was shocked...I wasn't ready for that statement even though I'm dying to hear it a long time ago...I was afraid but I tried to pull myself together as I watched Kris drew in a deep breath.... I felt his arm tense tightly round my shoulders. The subject was obviously something that touched a nerve.