Exploring the Inside

Release

Releasing. That's precisely what I am doing. There is so much going on inside that no one understands. I don't even understand it sometimes. It's difficult. Difficult to express myself to others. Emotion wise exactly. I bottle it all up. Usually they say you can't bottle things up because it will all explode, but I have acquired the trait of being an expert at keeping it under control. I don't know why but I just don't like to express my emotions and what's going on inside of my head with others. Maybe it's because I feel vulnerable. Or maybe because it's because I dislike being misunderstood. Or even just simply because I feel like no one really cares. Either way it's easier to keep to myself. I have no motivation to share with others. Hell, I have no motivation to even interact with others sometimes. I don't know I just don't care enough to I guess. I usually just like to mind my own business. However, it has detrimental factors. Being kept to myself all the time gives off a bad vibe to others. It also causes me to push people away and not let them in. This results in an undeniable loneliness. I've learned over time how to deal with the loneliness. But it never fully goes away no matter how hard you fight it.