Married To My Enemy, Ross Lynch

NOT AN UPDATE: self harm

Ok, I'm sorry this isn't an update , but I promise I will I just need time to write and create a plot. So...

Hey, i know this topic isn't related to this story at all but I just wanna share how I feel. And the topic is self harm and depression.

So, ever since last year, I've been self harming myself with a razor and no one knew about this except my really close friends. I even tried drinking chemicals that were very poisonous but I only had a small dose. Now this year, I tried to stop and I was kinda proud of myself for not cutting for 3 months straight. I know that may seem ridiculous cause of how short that time is, but to me that's a long time. But life is never perfect and I've been dealing with a lot of depression now. I dont know what it is honestly, is it the drama? The fights? The stress? The death? Or more? There's been too much going on. Which is one of the reasons I've been updating less, but I'm still trying. I then started cutting again these past few weeks and I just can't handle this horrible world. And I know I'm not the only one who cuts and self harms. I've been crying for no apparent reason. I go to a restorative circle, (I am forced to go there) and I barely get sleep some days then some days I over sleep. This past week I've noticed I've been seeing hallucinations and weird things. Nothing seems fun anymore and I've attempted suicide more than once... So that's my story, my friends think I have depression, i think I'm pretty sure  I do. But I'm scared of my parents finding out since they always push me to do my best. They think I'm a bubbly girl with high grades and expectations.If they found out what's ACTUALLY happening, I know I am letting them down and I love them so much but I'm scared I'm gonna disappoint them.

So enough about me... If you were a victim of self harm. Listen, I know you've heard people saying not to hurt yourself cause it's 'stupid' but honestly they know nothing about us. I'll be honest, cutting myself relives  my stress for some reason.

Now if you are trying to stop hurting yourself, and you haven't harmed yourself recently. Even if no cares for you or gives a damn about you. Know, that I am VERY proud of you. And I care for everyone who's dealing with these problems like me. Cause your not a waste of space. Your not a slut or whatever stupid people tell you. You are beautiful, no matter what. Even if you slapped some shit in your face. There's something inside of every person, that thing is beauty. You guys should appreciate the things you have until you lose them. I learned that the hard way. Anyways, concluding my lecture, just so you know, I can relate to all the things you've been through. And if you ever need a friend, I'll be there. Just send me a message me. Or Kik (tasmiagirl). I'll be there sort out all the problems.

Stay strong girls. Love you 😊