To The People We'll Never Trust

To The People We'll Never Trust- 04

to the people we'll never give the satisfaction

-

I wasn't joking when I said I was always ready to leave. I wasn't welcomed there, so why be prepared to stay, when you can prepare to leave?

After Alexander told me what he'd really wanted to after all this time, I packed my things and was on my way. I had around $1500 dollars saved up from Summer jobs, and a bit more cash from other savings along the way.

The house had been silent when I dropped my key on the table, even though I knew everyone was there. They were probably just too shocked to hear Alexander say such things to my face.

So here I am, sitting in my car in a 24 hour WalMart, at 12 o'clock in the morning, debating whether or not it would be a good idea to rent a hotel room for the night, or save some money and just sleep in my car.

I had to think smart.

Deciding to sleep in my car, because why not 'Save money, live better', I open my car door, quickly hopping out and opening my back doors, where I started making space for my body to lay.

Due to my extensive paranoia, I was scared shitless. Never had I been out this hour of night by myself, about to sleep in a WalMart parking lot. So please, don't be mad when I say I was starting to get a tad bit weary.

I should've made some friends, to be honest. For times like this where I needed a place to crash for the night. But, no. It's my thing to be a lone wolf. Totally solo.

'Oh my gosh, that Jason Derulo song, Solo, from like, 2009. Those were really his good days, now his music is kinda trash.' I think to myself as I lie down on my backseat, locking myself inside my car.

As I think about Jason Derulo, and today's event's, finally, I drift off to sleep.

-

My back hurts.

Car seats aren't the most comfortable, I knew that, but what I didn't know, was that it would be this uncomfortable.

Considering I'd taken 2 Advil's already 2 hours ago, when I'd woken up at 4 in the fucking morning, I was not in a good mood. And definitely not in a good enough mood to see that I had 24 missed calls.

Alexander (6) , P.O #1 (10) , P.O #2 (8)

'P.O' was a little joke about my parents I had made between Myself and I, wa couple of years back. It stood for 'Parole Officer', and I thought it was quite funny, because they only happen to show up when you're giving trouble of some sort. Like now.

Oh, look. Voicemail.

P.O #1 "Get home right now! I don't understand why you're so troubles-"

I cut off my mother's voicemail, before she could even properly start lecturing me. I honestly hate when they decide to start acting like a parent towards me.

As I sat in my car, thinking about what the hell I was supposed to do, the sun started to rise and I realized it had been more than an hour since I'd woken up.

This wasn't thought out. Me, of all people, should have made a more calculated move than this one. I had no one to help me in this situation, because I had the worst attitude ever. Bit I definitely won't give my family the satisfaction of me returning home after one night.

I had to figure this out.

After sitting in the driver's seat for a couple hours or so, staring at my steering wheel, the pit in my stomach just didn't seem to want to go away. I hadn't gone to school, seeing as I was in a state of worry. What if I never find somewhere to stay? I mean, I wasn't being rational before, but now, I'm starting to think this might've been the worst good idea ever.

Feeling defeated, I called my 24 year old cousin, who wasn't as terrible as terrible as my other family members.

The phone rung for what seemed like hours, before he picked up. "Yo."

"It's Alexandra. And I know I shouldn't be asking, but I need your help." I sighed, running a hand through my hair.

"With what?" He asked slowly, as if scared to know what.

"Can I stay with you for a bit? Like, not too long, but maybe a month-" I stopped, feeling really pathetic. "Or two?"

He paused, which made me kind of terrified of him refusing to let me stay at his apartment. "You're lucky I'm not a total dick. Come on over."

I smiled, relieved that I wasn't gonna have to spend the rest of my days with no other shelter than my car and have to live off the land. "Thanks, James. I apprecia-" I was cut off by the dial tone as I tried to thank my cousin.

Still a douche, I see.

 Digging me hand in my pocket, I get my key out and start my engine, driving out of the Walmart parking lot.