Pins and Needles

I got this soccer mom feel from him

Jake and I had this great impulsive idea to go crash Jill's place. We'd buy some alcohol first, maybe a few jelly beans so she'd forgive us for the invasion and then we'd go find ourselves an amazing party.

Needless to say, Jake and I were pumped. We hadn't done this together in a while and we were feeling nostalgic as fuck. It's crazy how I hadn't seen Jake in a while yet when I saw him, it seemed as if it were yesterday. No awkward feeling and no weird silences whatsoever.

We had everything under control and we were ready to go so I was a little lost when Jake didn't move. He just stood there, waiting on the pavement for a fucking wizard to come and teleport us. Then I learned Parker was his ride and he was heading the same way. So after I said goodbye to Brad and Parker, saying something that could've been 'bye little fuckers', I saw them again not even five minutes later.

Talk about feeling like an idiot.

Parker took this opportunity to act like a complete douchebag. I didn't even know the guy but he wasn't gonna let us drive along with him for free.

"I don't like being called a little fucker. I'm a big fucker," Parker reprimanded. He caressed his clean shaven jaw and pretended to be in deep thought. "Now, how are you gonna make it up to me."

"Don't act like you're actually thinking about this. We all know you're not capable of great ideas," Jake told his friend. Although, I wasn't sure whether they were actually friends so I decided to label it as frenemies. Mainly because it sounded so girly.

"I want you to ink me for free," Parker said.

"Deal. I get to choose where," I said and shook his hand firmly.

"You have a nice grip," he said with a dirty smile on his face. Really? He was just another Jake? No wonder Jake didn't really like him. Jake could barely handle himself.

"I know. I have many unspoken talents," I winked and got into the car. I hadn't missed Brad's amused look on his face.

Jake and I got forced to sit in the back because we were the 'babies' to which Jake started crying really loud like the most obnoxious baby in the world. Once he threatened to poop his pants, the guys apologised and promised never to call us babies again. I was just glad Jake had stopped crying next to my ear.

"I know where I'll ink you," I told Parker after a little while.

I noticed him looking at me through the rearview mirror. "Where?"

"Your balls," I deadpanned.

Jake and Brad burst out in laughter while Parker visibly swallowed a lump in his throat. His eyes went big and he didn't know me well enough to figure out whether I was joking or not.

"So have you beaten the world record for schtupping on campus yet?" I asked Jake casually while the guys in the front were talking about something else, most likely burgers.

"I'm dating Sam, remember?" Jake asked.

"You're still dating her? Wow. Of course I remember Sam." How could I forget? I swear, if I were gay, I'd totally go for someone like Sam. She was blunt, had these cold eyes that sucked you in and reminded me a little of Olivia Wilde.

"Two years and counting," Jake explained.

"Gross."

"Really gross, but it's Sam we're talking about," he told me and I couldn't disagree with that. I just never thought Jake'd actually settle down. I mean, he'd try and succeed for a month or four but after that I figured he'd go back to being his old slutty self.