One-Hundred Text Messages

[56] new messages

this reminds me of the time you were in the hospital.

the time you were upset, and  you told me countless times of how you wanted to hurt yourself, and I told you not to.

I knew you were too chicken to, no matter how many tumblr gifs you've seen of cutting and how easy you thought it would be, I could see you were scared to death of ever doing it.

and after months of trying to convince yourself you should and having me tell you no, you found a blade in the mcdonalds bathroom, and I don't know what got into you. at the time I thought it was because I couldn't afford the large fries you wanted but when I walked in to find the old lady holding you up, I knew it was just temptation. temptation at it's best.

and I think the funny part out of everything is how you could never hurt yourself and never would, until that one time you did, and everyone here assumed you were completely psychotically suicidal and danger to me, when in reality, you were just naturally sad.

sad and over emotional. and maybe that was when you tried to change, tried to stop being sad, but part of your body refused, it's gotten so comfortable with the darkness it couldn't bare the light, and pulled you in even more, pulled you to the point of what they called depression

but I called it bullshit. when you have depression it feels like you're slowly drowning. And you were a great swimmer ameria.

Received: Dec, 12, 2012, at 11:433 PM