( WHITE LIGHT )
Annie and Bobby are sitting on the sofa. A ghost, Haskel Crane, materializes through a wall in front of them and moves a chair closer to a bar. "All right, that's cool." Annie says.
"Excuse me. Hey! Boss!" Bobby yells and Haskel ignores them. He sits down and opens a book.
"Dick." Annie says.
"Yeah, well... Ghosts ain't the most sociable type to come down the pike. But if he can do it..." Bobby tries to move the table in front of him, but falls through it onto the floor. Haskel laughs. "Balls."
"Graceful." Annie says.
"Novices. You all make the Same mistakes." Haskel says as Bobby and Annie walk over to him.
"I suppose you know all about it." Bobby says.
"Well, I've been at it 80 years."
"Yo, uh, fresh meat here. Not even sure what happened." Annie says.
"Really?" Asks Haskel.
"I got shot right in the melon, never felt a thing. You?" Bobby asks.
"I was stabbed, brutally, right here at this bar, April 17, 1932."
"Who done ya?" Bobby asks.
"I'm really very busy." Haskel says.
"How come there's so many dead folk in this place, anyway? You know anything about that?" Bobby says.
"I guess we're not supposed to talk about that." Annie says as Haskel starts to stand up. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry." Haskel sits back in his chair. "Uh, my friend is a little nosy, mister...?"
"Crane – Haskel Crane."
"Haskel... you're right. We are novices, so, could you do me a solid and show me how to move that chair? It's one stupid chair." Annie says.
"Baby steps, gorgeous. Try this first." Haskel pushes a candle across the bar towards Annie. She tries to grab it, but her hand passes straight through. Bobby tries and the Same thing happens. "You're angsting at it. You know what getting frustrated will get you?" He chuckles. "Nothing. You've got two ways to move things. What I did – which you obviously must – is calm yourself."
"You're saying we should move crap with the power of Zen." Bobby asks.
"I'm telling you to let go of all that. Calmly tell the thing what to do." Haskel says and Bobby reaches a hand towards the candle. "You're getting tense."
"You're not helpful." Bobby tries to grab the candle, but his hand passes through it again. "What's option two? You said there were two ways."
"Oh, you could use explosive anger and pure, red-hot rage, but that's impossible to manufacture. Sorry." Haskel says.
"Makes sense. Like poltergeists – vengeful spirits." Annie says.
"I am vengeful. You think I don't have red-hot rage?" Asks Bobby.
"I think you're a sad excuse for one of us, and I'm unsurprised that you're failing." Haskel says. "Take my help or don't, but if you want to move a flea, surrender."
"For the record, I hated that Swayze flick – romantic bullcrap." Bobby reaches a hand towards the candle again. A woman screams. Bobby and Annie turn and see that the screaming is coming from one of the ghosts in the room. The ghost then rushes towards them, before turning into dust and vanishing. "What in cold hell was that?"
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