✓ lights /styles au/

24 Medicine

(A/n: I hope this isn't too soon.)

give me your hand.

'Do you think you love me?'

Josephine hadn't taken her hands off of the wheel for an hour. She passed the exit she was suppose to get off at, and didn't bother trying to find another route. The night was gradually growing into morning and the windows of the car were down. Harry was strapped down by the seatbelt on the passenger side, hands rubbing together to stay warm. He hadn't said anything since they were at Niall's apartment. Normally the silence annoyed her, but this time it was welcomed. She didn't want him talking to her.

'Maybe you'll love me tomorrow?'

She felt sick. Her stomach was twisting with something that she wanted to call disgust, though she wasn't quite sure. The speed limit signs she kept passing were morphing against the highway. There was no doubt she was passing them. It was dangerous, but so was sitting next to Harry.

"Jo, slow down," his voice broke through the sound of the wind. He rolled up his window and was looking at her. "We can't be going this fast."

They were in the elevator and the walls were closing in on her. His back was pressed against the wall. 'You don't hate me, right?'

She shook her head and kept her foot on the gas, keeping her eyes on the road and pretending his gaze didn't make her feel more sick to her gut. He's drunk, she was trying to remind herself. He probably won't even remember any of this in the morning.

'You don't have to, like, say it back or anything.'

She got off on the closest exit and pressed harder on the gas, hands tightening over the wheel until her knuckles were white. Everything was blurring outside of the car. The lights looked more like lines of white and the cars they passed blurred in with the darkness.

"Slow the car down or we'll get into an accident."

Jo stopped the car abruptly, the force pushing her forward and into the wheel. Harry's head hit the glove compartment and he groaned out loud as her shoulders slumped forward.

Letting out an uneasy breath, Josephine closed her eyes and tapped her fingers against the leather. They were in front of a run-down Inn with busted lights. There were only two cars in the driveway other than hers.

"I'm sorry," she finally said, voice cracking. It took her a moment to realize she was crying. "Are you okay?"

His hand came up to her back, rubbing small circles through her shirt. The feeling was strangely welcoming considering how much she was feeling like shit. He said he loved her. She had to keep reminding herself that.

"I'm really sorry," she said again, straightening her back and wiping at her face. "I'm sorry." She didn't know what she was apologizing for. Maybe the reckless driving or maybe the fact that she hadn't addressed anything yet. Maybe she was apologizing for how insensitive she was being.

"Me too," he said quietly.

She turned her head to look at him. His left hand was still on her back while his right one settled on his lap. His lips were pulled into a frown as his eyes were facing the building in front of them. "Don't say that."

"That I'm sorry?" He asked, moving his hands to push his hair back. He licked his lips and she frowned at his confusion.

"Yeah. I'm being stupid about this. You can't be sorry for something like that because you didn't do anything wrong." He wasn't wrong, she was, and she bit down hard on her tongue so he wouldn't know she was crying. She kept wiping forcibly at her face, rubbing at her eyes and struggling to catch her breath.