Lost in Bewilderness

I can't keep it in.

From Jade's Mother's Point of View

I asked Ryan to sell his drugs, not shove them down Jade's throat. If he knew who she was maybe he'd treat her better and maybe she'd actually be popular. I decide that the longer I hide this, the worse it will become. I feel like shit for mistreating her and abusing her but I think it's the drugs. Those damn drugs. My damn addiction, at least to day I seemed to avoid them which made Jade say, "Don't you pretend to like me."

I had to say it. Fast, before I backed out.

"Jade, there reason we moved to New Jersey is because you are from New Jersey." I said tremulously, tripping over my words.

She was very startled. "Um okay? Can you like explain?" I felt like all hell was about to break loose.

"You know Ryan, he's the reason we moved to New Jersey." I continued.

"Excuse me but what the actual fuck?" She interrupts, and I don't blame her for this. "He just dosed me with some drugs which may I add, were supplied from you." I listened intently, I wanted to back out of this conversation but I know I couldn't. Not this time.

"Jade, I think Ryan is your brother." I muttered and she almost chocked on her sandwich when I said this.

"Stop kidding with me! This isn't a joke." She said but it seemed like she knew I wasn't kidding. Then she went on, "There's no way that he is. He hates me, he even flirts with me but he does that to embarrass me or something."

I think Jade didn't understand that sometimes siblings who didn't know they were related could have feelings for each other. Not sexual attraction, but more like love. This was the prime problem, because  Ryan didn't know that she was his sister, he just thought that he is in love with her or something. It was like that missing connection that they never had was suddenly ignited when they crossed paths. I didn't wanted to waste any more time so I added, "The day you appeared on my doorstep, there was news that another baby boy appeared on the doorstep of the Harts.

"The who?" Jade asked raising her eyebrows.

"The Harts, they were a very rich couple who were sort of known for their many failed attempts of having a baby." I explained a bit more relaxed but with caution.

From Jade's Point of View

I couldn't blame my mum for this, it must have been hard to muster up the courage.

I didn't know whether to believe this, a part of me wanted to and it started to dawn on me, that there were countless times where Ryan could've beat me up and ruined my reputation and improved his popularity. But he didn't. My conversation with him the previous day was vivid in my mind; every detail : the way he looked at me when I punched him, the way he laughed when I came up to him."Where are you going?" My mum asked as I threw my bag over me.

I was too excited and also quite scared to tell her that I was going to Ryan's, too much in a rush. Everyone knew where he lived; by the riverbank in an ultramodern house designed by his dad. Well not his real dad.

I don't know how but because I had Ryan's number, I texted him. "I'm at the front door."

About 20 seconds later he replies, "The maid will get you."

He had a maid? Well of course, he was the lucky twin. Within a couple of seconds after that text the maid open the door. She raised her eyebrow and shook her head, "You're one of those girls. Ryan's upstairs."

Excuse me, one of those girls? Who did she think she was talking to - A prostitute?
I pushed past her and went passed like 10 doors until I reached Ryan's bedroom. It was obvious, with the blue grey door and party streamers which hung from it. I knocked and he told me to come in.
"No, you come out." I retorted.

"Jade I've been thinking lately, how you asked me where and when I was born." Ryan said unexpectedly after he forced me into his bedroom.

"And?" I queried, sensing he had something else to say.

"I think you're my sister." He told me as he put one hand on my shoulder.

"Who told you that?" I shouted as he covered my mouth.

"Jade for all we know the maid might be eavesdropping behind the door." He whispered and led me into his walking closet, "Much better. Now we can talk."

It was that day in the closet, I learnt, that Ryan always felt left out. There was never that real connection- His parents bought him everything but never asked him what he really wanted in life: Their time. He didn't know of the rumour of his 'mum' who couldn't conceive. 

"I always felt adopted you know. So one day I asked them. I always wanted a brother or sister by my side but they always said that they didn't have the time. Then I wondered, what if I was adopted? What if they couldn't have any children." He said almost crying.

I couldn't bear to see him in such pain so I told him about everything my mum had admitted just  a couple of hours ago.