Colours of His Eyes

Chapter IX

As captain their third year, he knew he couldn't continue straining himself. He took Mondays, his old therapy days, for resting, but got right back to practice the next day, playing as if he had never left the court. Hajime was glad he was taking better care of himself. He was eating regularly, and his workout schedule wasn't so ridiculous. He was able to keep both himself and the team together, and Hajime admired him for that.

"Iwa-chan," Oikawa asked one night as he exercised his knee and Hajime sat by him finishing up his math work, "Have you met your soulmate?"

Hajime dropped his pen in surprise, turning to Oikawa, who wouldn't meet his eyes. "Have you?"

"Iwa-chan, don't change the subject! As much as I love talking about me, I was asking about you." Oikawa shifted so that he was hugging his green alien pillow, his back against the wall, looking at Hajime with his big brown eyes.

"... Yeah, I've met my soulmate." he answered, turning back to his homework and trying to focus again. He could still feel Oikawa's gaze, and he tried his best not to fidget. After a only few minutes, he dropped his pen again in frustration and glared at Oikawa. "Why do you keep looking at me, Shittykawa?"

"I'm not allowed to look at my best friend?" he answered, grinning teasingly. It seemed somewhat fake. Hajime's brows furrowed, and Oikawa withered under his look. "Fine, fine. Who is it?"

"Who is what?"

"Iwa-chan, don't be mean! You know what I'm asking!"

Yes, he knew. He just didn't want to tell. Oikawa made it so painfully obvious that he couldn't see colour, Hajime knew he couldn't be his soulmate. He didn't want Oikawa know about his completely unfair position. "No one you know."

"Iwa-chan! What's her name?" Oikawa pouted, now laying sideways on his bed, his head hanging upside-down, his beautiful hair hanging from his forehead in gentle waves.

"You don't know them."

"Iwa-chan, please?"

"You really don't, you wouldn't recognize the name anyway."

"Why aren't you telling me? I thought we were friends, Iwa-chan!"

"It doesn't matter!" Hajime turned back to the paper in front of him, fuming, ignoring the hurt silence. He was frustrated by Oikawa's insistence and his ridiculous hair and his stupid mouth and the unnecessary urge to smooch those perfect pale cheeks.

He regretted yelling almost immediately, but he couldn't turn around and face Oikawa's look. He was probably confused. He didn't know about Hajime's problem, and it wasn't his fault.

He moved back towards the bed and looked up, only to see Oikawa's face buried in his pillow and his shoulders shaking. He could hear quiet sniffling that he hadn't noticed before. Oh no.

"Shit, are you crying? Look, I didn't mean to yell, I-"

"Iwa-chan, please go home."

Hajime's hand stopped midway to Oikawa's shoulder, frozen. The voice had been choked up, but steady enough. And it had told Hajime to go home. He had never been told to go home by Oikawa before, especially when he was crying. He was supposed to be comforting him, laying his arms over his back and hugging him, until he smiled and muttered the usual 'thanks, Iwa-chan'. He was not supposed to be sent home.

He picked up his homework and stuffed it in his bag, throwing it over his shoulder before heading out the door. He muttered a quick 'sorry' before leaving, wondering what he could do to make this better.

Tooru wished Iwaizumi had stayed turned around. Then he wouldn't have noticed him crying and he could've stayed and maybe they could have made cookies or something and had a grand old time and he would forget about the whole yelling thing.

He had been startled, that was all. Iwaizumi yelled all the time, but rarely was it so fiercely directed towards Tooru. It was his shock that made his heart pop and disappear. It wasn't that Tooru might be in love with him, it was just bewilderment. Of course. They were best friends, that's all. He didn't want to ruin that. Although maybe his crying had already taken care of ruining it.

Iwaizumi had met his soulmate. That was a blow. And then, to top it off, he wouldn't tell Tooru who it was. Was he ashamed? Or did he just think his best friend didn't have a right to know?

He buried his face in his pillow again, curling up in his blanket, and tried not to start bawling again.

He hadn't cried in a while, and he had been proud of it. He used to be quite the crybaby, and Iwaizumi had to comfort him all the time, laying across from him and rubbing his shoulders and whispering about how it would be better in the morning. And it had been better, because Iwaizumi was there to hold his hand and reassure him about whatever it was as they went about their day.

But now look at him.

He was alone.

Goddammit, why was everything good ruined because of him? Okay, maybe that was a little over the top, but he was the little bitch who had started crying when really all Iwaizumi had done was kept his privacy.

Tooru disappeared deeper into his blanket, wondering why he wanted to be with Iwaizumi so badly.

Hajime opened the door to his room and collapsed almost immediately onto his futon, groaning into the plain white pillow that cushioned his fall. He hadn't needed to yell, really, it was normal for Oikawa to be a little pushy. He probably felt like Hajime had wronged him by withholding information, they had always told each other everything.

Well, almost everything.

Hajime bit his lip and sat up, realizing he hadn't eaten yet. He walked into the quiet, dark kitchen and looked for leftovers from dinner, before remembering his mom and sister had gone out to eat. Damn. He settled for some ramen he found in the cupboard, sitting down at the deserted table. It was a little lonely. Usually he ate with Oikawa. Oikawa liked pork ramen, and sometimes put eggs in it. He preferred less broth, and ate it with a fork instead of chopsticks, even when Hajime made fun of him for it.

Funnily enough, after he finished his quick bowl of tasteless ramen, there was still a pit in his stomach.