Preface
“Last night I had a dream, in this dream we were tiny specks in a vast, uncaring universe. I tried to count all the stars but felt infinity staring back at me, and it was terrifying. I realized something in that moment, I am an impossibly unique combination of atoms, a special consciousness, that will eventually dismantle, and drift apart forever. And then I’ll be gone, into an unimaginable void, where even sadness can’t exist.”
I remember the rain, cool and slow, like some strange language. It seemed to cleanse the sins from my skin, but it hasn’t rained here in weeks, a hot dry summer. I hate summer. I hate everything about summer- the dry feel in the air, the green grass and the hills of evergreen- it only gets peoples hopes up they live free in summer, free from school, free from worries, and free from the cold harsh chills of winter. Eventually summer ends and fall comes around and the green grass fades into a dull gray, and the trees wither and die, that’s my favorite time of the year. It shows the obvious, but ignored, truth of the world; that everything dies and nothing lasts forever. Grey skies of mourning and clear sheets of rain to match that is the world I live in, a permanent grey haze.
It has been 1year 2 months and 1 day since the incident, the incident that changed my life. I can never forget that moment, the moment where the line between sane and insane came crashing down like the walls of Jericho. I have been stuck in this world of grey ever since, bound and forbidden to never return. This is…The killing loneliness
