Summer of '13

Chapter 3

The realization struck me hard. It took a little time to register but eventually it turned out to be a sweet surprise. Whilst I was reading the diary....I started analysing the mannerisms of Anne.It was peculiar that she led a life under circumstances I could not relate to but I could I understand her emotions.The way she wanted to confide her feelings to someone trustworthy. The way she hated her mother whenever she compared Anne to her sister,Margot.The way she felt isolated....lonely..shattered. I was not the only one...they were many others...practically every other teenager had my problems. This was amazing..I could relate to somebody..wow! More than helping for my history research,this book was kind of counselling me. Afterall that 'croaky-croak' (my librarian) was not that bad. But I couldn't figure out how this book was to help me with my project.

Yet after reading one more chapter about Anne cussing her mother.I had resolved it. I put the book down back on my shelf and  went straight to my mom's room

"Mom...I need to ask something" I said almost whispering.

"Yes...do you need help in geography?" My mom asked, her eyes lightening up. Afterall,she loved geography and I hated it. Blame that on my geography teacher whose sole purpose in life seemed to be dictating questions and shouting at us.

"no"...I said.."well...I wanted to ask whether you were the topper of your class when you were in your school"

"haha...no..though I was pretty good at social science" She reasoned.

"and whats your opinion about me" I asked. 

"You are brilliant..why? The only thing is you are not industrious" She said with a firm voice.

I realized she was the best person with whom I could confide my feelings with.

"Is teenage life difficult?" I asked yet again.

She looked at me with those deep eyes and a visage which showed lines of experience.

"Yes..definitely.The most difficult phase where you do not know where you stand. You are expected to be an adult and a child at the same time.Couple it with increasing pressure of school. You have to have a firm hold of your senses at this point of time..or you could wither away.It's difficult but not impossible." She replied,concern reflecting in her voice.

And suddenly I was filled with rage..."If you know so much about teenage life..why can't you understand me?!! Am I different or what!? oh! so I am incorrigible? and what about you mom..you were amazing,obedient and studious? weren't you like me? So why do you fail to understand me?" I couldn't understand why anger surged inside me but I felt that confronting was better than keeping it to yourself.

Mom was taken aback at my quick reaction but she was agile at figuring out my problem.Without any hint of anger she took me in her arms and pacified me.

"I scolded you simply because I felt  you were wasting your time reading some other book..I did not realize you were preparing for your history project.I felt frustated at your behaviour and called your incorrigible.That's my fault. Your exams are nearing..you ought to get back to studying. Take a break,refresh yourself and then study.A frustated mind can't concentrate.Firstly complete your project. I may had not been the topper of my class but  I took initiative and thats what you are lacking in" 

She was so calm and composed. Suddenly everything felt sorted out. I realized that my mother was a human with feelings.She may have experienced the teen years herself but she was frustrated at my indifferent behaviour. Now she understood me better and vice versa. Now I resolved to do something.

a. Return the book to the library and thank that croaky-croak for giving me such an amazing book.It may not have much info on nazism but my recently repaired internet connection could do me some good.

b. Take an initiative.