Living at 2AM

Chapter 1

I have only cried twice in the past hour, since graduation exactly 28hrs ago, which I have to say is a huge accomplishment. I never thought I'd be the one going through friend withdrawals. But here I am on a friday night sitting in a mountain of tissues with puffy eyes. I barely remembered anyone from high school and yet I missed every single person. Including those who I'd only spoken to once and the ones I couldn't survive without. My two best friends were currently awol and I was in desperate need of their company.

After graduation Mai Ly's family decided to go back home to Vietnam to visit their grandparents. Mai was more than willing to stay behind to help ensure my sanity. After weeks of trying to convince her that my mental health would be perfectly fine I had finally persuaded her to go. With my history of panic attacks, it wasn't an easy thing to do. However, I would have never sent Mai off to visit her family if I'd known Alise was going to ditch me as well. She received a last minute opportunity to interview for an internship at some huge Financial Company in Connecticut.

Lucky for me they were both going to be back in a couple of days. I'm interested to see what color Mai's hair will be this time around or if Alise finally grew enough to reach the top cabinet. Thinking of my two best friends only made me cry even more. I don't think I have enough tears to satisfy my urgent need to cry.

Dragging me away from my thoughts I hear three soft taps on my door. I know that it's my mom immediately. She had been up to check on me every two hours to make sure I'm okay. I sent her away with an "I'm fine" each time.

"Are you sure I can't persuade you to come down and watch a movie with your father and I?" She asked in a worried tone that almost made me consider watching Dazed and Confused...again. I loved my parents as much as any other kid but what I craved wasn't the attention of my parents... but the company of my friends.

"No, mom, I think I'm just going to read until I doze off. I'll see you in the morning."

I pulled my knees up to my chest preparing to continue my pity party when I hear another knock on the door. "Mom, I said I was-..." I was cut off by Felicity waltzing into my room with one ounce too much of pep to match my mood. Her face slowly dropped as she took in my apparent mood. I hadn't bothered to do my hair today and so my sandy locks lay disheveled around my face. My eyes are no doubt red from the hours of nonstop crying.

"Why do you look like your dog just died? Irie, what's wrong? What is it?" She said with a worried expression. I swear between her and my mom they could start a campaign for worrywarts. I don't really feel like talking about it so I avoided the question.

"Umm...I never had a dog." I tell her with a confused look on my face.

"I know you don't!" She nearly screams at me clearly recognizing that I am avoiding the question. She knows that talking about my feelings isn't my favorite pastime or even one I sort of enjoy. "What's the matter?" She said in a much softer tone. Dodging the question again I throw a question her way.

"What are you doing here?" The harshness of my tone shocked both me and Felicity.

"Relax, I'm only here to make sure you are going to my graduation party tomorrow." Felicity has been talking about this party ever since we entered senior year. I believe the words she used to describe it were "epic" and "monumental." Felicity loved throwing parties and she was good at it. Her bubbly and outgoing personality was truly inviting and came in handy when she hosted a party. I, on the other hand, rarely went out. My room was the safest place for me.

I rolled my eyes. "Yes, I'll be there Lici. I don't think you would let me live if I missed this party. The party of all parties." I mocked. I had to go, right? She was my friend. I just hope my anxiety didn't get the best of me... again.

She shot daggers my way and I giggled at how important this party was to her. This would be the first time since graduation that our graduating class had been together, all at once. Maybe this party will have some significance.

"Just don't forget...and wear something nice...and do your hair." She would have continued judging me if I hadn't cut in.

"Yeah, yeah. I get it. Show up presentable. I got it." I got up, began pushing her out my room before closing the door and falling on to my bed into a deep sleep.

I slowly awaken to the smell of pancakes and wiped the sleep out my eyes. I hesitantly get out of bed, afraid that my legs will fail me, and follow the intoxicating smell into the kitchen. I found my dad at the table reading the cartoons from the newspaper. I kissed him on the cheek and did the same to my mother who was pouring coffee into our mugs. I sat across from my dad and he adjusted the newspaper so I could read the cartoons on the back page. That was a tradition we had, one that I hadn't thought he'd realized until recently when he began asking me if I was done reading.

"So, what did Felicity want last night? She seemed like she really had to tell you something." My mom asked trying to make conversation.

"Nothing she just thought she'd come by and check on me seeing that Mai and Alise are away until tomorrow."

My mom smiled "That was sweet of her." I nodded in agreement.

"I imagine you girls have something fun planned for Alise and Mai's return?" My dad questioned while looking up from his newspaper for the first time.

"Just a sleepover at Quin's place." I nervously giggled and silently prayed that he wouldn't push any further. I usually tell my parents everything, but I wasn't in the mood for them to ask too many unnecessary questions. My head hurt from crying all night and a game of 21 questions was only going to make it worse. 

"Are you okay? You seem a bit weird this morning." He narrowed his eyes at me as if he had just cracked the code.

"Weird... Me? No...I uh... I'm just really excited to be sleeping over a Quin's. It's been so long since the last time we all hung out together besides school." I innocently said hoping that my rambling would be enough to convince him that I was fine.

"Okay when are you heading over to Quin's?" And just in the nick of time, I get a text from Quin. "Hey, I'm omw...hurry up and get ready we have shopping to do." None of us had gotten an outfit to wear to the party, and by none of us I meant me.

"Now!" I tell my parents laughing as I ran upstairs to get ready and grab my overnight bag. I hear a horn signaling that Quin is here. I say a quick goodbye to my parents as I rush out of the door and into to Quin's car. This should be fun. A day of shopping with Quin and Zoë, note the obvious sarcasm.

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