Orphans | Larry

6

Louis POV

Wait...un-clasp her bra? And then, it suddenly hit me, like a tonne of bricks. I was about to fuck this girl. What was I thinking?

"I-i-i can't do this." I said. Taking off the condom as I struggled to pull up my boxers and jeans. I leaned down in order to pick up my shirt that was sprawled across the floor. I hurried to put it on, ashamed of my body. It hadn't mattered before, because we were both too distracted to focus on each others bodies. I think we both just wanted something quick. The poor girl had sat up, pulling the sheet up so that she was covered. She looked confused, but I'm sure she didn't care too much.

"Are you being fucking serious?" she spoke out in a quite frankly annoying voice. "So you were just going to fuck me and leave?" What was this girl going on about? Like could someone please clarify? Because I was genuinely so confused.

I was now standing, fully clothed, with my eyebrow raised. "I'm sorry...what?" I realised that I probably sounded like your typical 'fuckboy' at this moment in time, but to be blunt what was this girl expecting.

"It's because I'm too fat isn't it?" Tears began to fall down her face, leaving a trail of mascara in their trace. I just needed a moment at this stage to process everything, because my brain really didn't want to function with me.

"No, Trust me it's not you it's me." I realised how cliche that sounded and so I walked over to where she was on the bed, awkwardly placing my hand on her shoulder. I however, didn't want to sit on the bed as I felt that it would cause even more unnecessary tension. I then followed up my actions by saying, "I'm gay, just don't tell anyone."

"So it's not me?" She asked, as if not believing what had just come out of my mouth.

"Course not love. If I were straight I'd be all over you." I added a wink but at that moment, my body had decided to work against me, making it look as if my eye had just had some sort of spasm. She giggled at this.

"I'm just going to go...you know things to do." Things where getting really awkward, at least for me, so I wanted to leave. And badly. "I'm sure I'll see you around D...?" I felt slightly guilty that I hadn't remembered her name. But then again I hadn't really had the time to process it.

"Danielle." She breathed.

"Seeya around, Danielle." I followed up my actions with a nod, before leaving the room. There wasn't much more that I could've done. I went downstairs to face the new nightmare, which was trying to get Zayn home.

I spotted him squished up against Perrie, which surprised me. They seemed to be really hitting off, she didn't strike me as the 'Zayn' type.

I walked over to him, waving my hand across his face in order to catch his attention, "Zayn I'm gonna head out, you coming?"

Zayn shook his head, "Perrie will give me a lift, won't ya?" He asked, directing the question at her.

"Sure thing." She said with a smile.

"Okay lovebirds, I'll catch you later." I said, a natural eye roll from Zayn followed.

"Louis..." He said ushering me to come closer, so that he could whisper in my ear, "Protect my car as if it's your child."

I laughed and shook my head in disbelief that he cared so much about his car, before patting my pockets in order to make sure that the car keys were there. With one final look behind me, I left the party.

-

Everything just felt wrong: the seat belt was too tight, my feet could only just reach the peddle, which made me feel even smaller than I already felt, and it wasn't dark enough.

I let my eyes wander to the car clock, it read 22:34. Of course it was dark, but my flashlights shun too bright onto the road, illuminating the area.

Thoughts began to cloud my head, thoughts which revolved around a certain brunette girl. I didn't have any feelings for her, of course, but I just felt bad.

Really bad.

It was the look on her face just before I left the room that keeps repeating in my mind, the way she'd started crying out of nowhere. She seemed broken, and I knew I wasn't the one who would fix her.

I bashed the steering wheel in frustration. I'd probably made everything a thousand times worse for this girl, and it was too late now, the damage was done.

Thoughts were rushing through my head so fast that I found it difficult to focus on the road ahead of me, my mind was somewhere else. It was back at the party.

Flashbacks of me on top of  her clouding my concentration. The guilt of leaving so quickly was hanging heavily over me.

I wasn't one to feel guilt easily either, I'd become immune to most feelings other than sadness, but I couldn't shake her out of my mind.

And then it hit me why I felt so bad. It was because she reminded me of myself. Obviously I hadn't been in that situation, but I had been in a similar one, as a child. That day will never leave my memory, it's permanently implanted.

I approached the stop sign, but my mind was unfocused, meaning I didn't see it.

I continued driving, at the speed I was going at this entire car journey. A speed that was too fast.

I pulled myself out off my thoughts, finally, but I was too late.

Before I had time to process what was happening, I hit the car driving across.

I didn't remember much seconds before hitting it, but there was something that I just couldn't shake. And that was how just before colliding, the flashlights had reflected the eye colour of the man driving.

My eyes had connected with a pair of green eyes which were all too familiar, and there was nothing I could do but slam the breaks and watch the car I'd hit roll over and over...