You Were Supposed to Save Me - Chris Motionless Sequel

You're a Monster

(A/N: just to be clear, last time (in the last chapter since it was confusing admittedly) Chris Overheard Josh and Samantha talking in their bedroom and overheard Josh say that it might me his baby... I didn't go into any other details so... ENJOY)

********************************Trigger Warning****************************************

*Chris's POV*

"I thought i trusted you." My voice came out rough and shaky because i couldn't decide whether i should be angry or upset or even both. This was a toxic mix of emotions that i sure couldn't handle right now. Just when i thought life was finally going to be okay and i was out of the mental hospital, this shit happens. It's always me.

I could sense that Ghost was watching me from afar just in case i started getting violent or breaking down.

"You don't understand..." Josh started, taking a step forward but i lunged back like he had an airborne disease.

"How dare you tell me i don't understand.... What the fuck did i just hear in there?" My frustration levels were rising dramatically. "I had to watch her in the hospital, wondering if she'd be okay, and then find out that she remembered everyone but me. Do you even know how that made me feel?" I felt salty and burning tears start to brim at the edge of my reddened eyes, making my vision blurry, but i didn't care.

"Chris, I..."

"Get the fuck out." I snarled ferociously. Josh bowed his head in disappointment.

"Chris, it's not his fault..." Samantha touched my arm gingerly. "We were both drunk... and... hospital... not his fault." I only heard those bits in pieces of her speech through my deafening anger.

"Both of you... Get. Out." I shoved them towards my front door aggressively, then stopped in my tracks when i saw the tears swimming down Samantha's cheeks. I still wanted them to leave. I didn't want to see them, i didn't want to hear their lame stories, i just wanted them gone. Josh didn't stop on his way out just looked at Samantha sympathetically before bringing her out without him, but Samantha wasn't so quiet with her exit.

"You're a monster." She sobbed.

"Takes one to know one." I said back as i started emptily at her.

I didn't know what to do after that, but i did feel a familiar urge tugging at my gut. This was something i had been fighting off ever since it began. I knew what i had to do to not be lonely anymore. I knew what could take away all the pain i felt right now. Pills.

I had a stash of them underneath my bed where Ghost couldn't find them to take them away. They were a mixture of pills really from throughout the years. Anxiety, depression, painkillers, you name it. Without any one paying much attention, I slipped into my bedroom and closed and locked the door behind me. That's when it drew the most attention. I could hear Ghost shuffling outside my door nervously. "Chris, what are you doing in there?" He shouldn't have to play stupid with me, he knew damn well what i was about to do.

Now that i felt safe in my room with no one to criticize or watch me, i let myself break down into tears with the orange pill bottle in my hand. The pain i was feeling was unbearable, the emotions sitting in my stomach like i had swallowed a bowling ball and it couldn't be digested. "Chris open the door..."

I wasn't going to attempt to kill myself, i knew that would do me no good, but maybe if i just put myself in a temporary coma i could figure things out. I lazily turned the white cap of the pill container until it was completely open. I was disappointed to see that there were only a few (maybe ten) small pills left at the bottom. Hopefully this will be enough to numb everything. "Chris, whatever you're about to do, you're going to regret it...." Ghost sounded frantic, wiggling the locked door handle."I'm getting Janice, please don't do anything stupid..."